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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

I accidentally messed up my life. How do I start a new account?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

I’ve walked the walk, but nowadays I just sit the sit.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

Ever thought about centaurs and how the bottom half would start walking immediately after birth but the top part would be baby-like and flop around for a while.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

It’s obvious now that democracy is a busted flush and that in future politicians should be selected via several rigorous rounds of Taskmaster.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

That awkward moment you can’t understand what somebody is saying after they have repeated it about five times.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

Jealous that my phone can just die for a little while.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Your life can’t fall apart if you never had it together.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Snaccident: eating a whole bag of Doritos in one sitting.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Wow, this was a really long day of playing on my phone.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

After a quick review of my finances, everyone is going to have to be happy with a forehead kiss for Christmas.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Jan 19, 2026

3,486

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

I purposely overcook my holiday turkeys so I don’t have to hear anyone at the table say, “moist.”

Shared recently on Facebook:

Waking up early is always beneficial. You just gotta make it past those first 10 minutes of being irritated.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I don’t know the difference between “gray” & “grey” and I’m too scared to even ask.

Spotted on Slack:

My life is based on a true story.

Spotted on Twitch:

I’m perverted, but in an elegant and whimsical way.

Just landed via Telegram:

My brain has too many tabs open.

Making waves on Facebook:

The advantage of being an identical twin: you only need one gym contract.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

I’m sorry I roasted you, I was trying to flirt.

Just shared via YouTube:

Notifications are a reminder that you exist.

Going viral on Instagram:

I refuse to be bound by the social construct called “the calendar.” Merry Christmas, everyone.

122 Funny mean quotes

Funny mean quotes highlight the sarcastic, cheeky, and often exaggerated ways we can be “mean” — all with a big dose of humor! 😂😈 Whether it’s playful teasing, witty comebacks, or friendly roasts, these quotes remind us that being mean doesn’t always mean being rude — sometimes, it’s just the art of being funny. Because the line between “mean” and “hilarious” is pretty thin! 😆💀🎤

New funny mean quotes 👇

I’m always a little mean to men because, if you treat them like humans, they think you wanna sleep with them.

11 hours ago

always, dating, gender, human, humans, humor, interaction, little, man, mean, men, relationship, sleep, think, treat
When I say, “I have to be someplace,” what I mean is, “I want to go home.”

15 hours ago

being, being somewhere, going, going home, home, honesty, humor, i, introvert, mean, obligation, relatable, say, social, social obligation, somewhere, want
“Your boos mean nothing to me. I’ve seen what you cheer.” Is a goated doctrine. If Rick and Morty gave us anything, it gave us that.

16 hours ago

anything, boo, cheer, doctrine, goated, humor, me, mean, morty, nothing, rick, Rick and Morty, seen, us
I have no use for mean people. I’ll walk right past you like you’re furniture.

16 hours ago

attitude, furniture, humor, i, ignore, mean, mean person, past, people, person, right, walk
Don’t forget to be mean to strangers on the internet today, for no reason whatsoever.

17 hours ago

behavior, forget, humor, internet, mean, meanness, online, online behavior, reason, sarcasm, stranger, strangers, today
I mean, sex is all right, but have you ever experienced the sheer sensuality of having rock-solid proof that a problem at work was someone else’s fault, even though it really, really looked like it was yours?

17 hours ago

blame, even, ever, fault, having, humor, i, mean, office, problem, proof, right, sarcasm, sensuality, sex, sheer, someone, work, yours
IP address? You mean the bathroom?

18 hours ago

address, bathroom, humor, ip, IP address, joke, mean, misunderstanding, technology
ASAP can also mean as slow as possible.

20 hours ago

acronym, ASAP, humor, irony, management, mean, procrastination, slow, time, time management
Therapy? You mean birdwatching.

1 day ago

birdwatching, health, hobby, humor, mean, mental, mental health, relaxation, therapy
Why is everyone mean to the kindest people for absolutely no reason?

1 day ago

absolutely, behavior, empathy, everyone, interaction, irony, kindest, kindness, kindness paradox, mean, meanness, paradox, people, reason, social, social interaction, why

For even more funny mean quotes, hit next 👇

All funny mean quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

24 shares on Pinterest this month:

I hope whoever came up with the spelling for Wednesday was punished for their actions.

48 shares on TikTok this month:

We’d all look younger if we just avoided young people.

62 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m so single right now, I can’t even spell relayshaunship.

19 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The fact Head and Shoulders doesn’t have a body wash called Knees and Toes, is disappointing.

79 shares on Pinterest this month:

Even a broken shrimp fries rice twice a day.

86 shares on Facebook this month:

Hate when anxiety gives me stomach problems. Like, baby, you are supposed to be a mental disorder, please stay in your line.

45 shares on Instagram this month:

Of course women need more pockets, where are we supposed to hold all of our grudges?

11 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I have three kids. I should be terrified of sex.

14 shares on Slack this month:

I’ve spent years struggling to prove that the sunk-cost fallacy isn’t actually a fallacy. No sense in giving up now, though.

71 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’ve cut my fingernails too short and now I can’t open my shower gel. What’s the point of being well-groomed if I can’t smell like mangos?

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I asked my dad what his favorite joke was. He said, “I can’t pick a favorite. I love you and your sister equally!”

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I be butt naked, texting people, and they’ll never know.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s a good thing Titanic is only a movie. A lot of people would’ve died.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Love Island is fun, but when is Job Island on?

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Your 20s are for lusting after furniture you can’t afford actually.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Forrest Gump is a haunting film about how long you have to wait for a bus in America.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Lord, please take this gas out of my stomach and put it in my car.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Some nights I stay up hella late just farting.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Best thing about TikTok is you literally don’t need to follow anyone to have a good time.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Paid my rent and slept in every room of my house this week, kitchen and laundry room next.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,393

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

I only have one wish in life… For all my dreams to come true.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

Text a co-worker at a random time “are you joining this meeting?” as a fun holiday prank.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Getting tipsy at a dimly lit restaurant with good conversation would heal me right now.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

I was raised to be humble which I excel at cause I excel at everything.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

I was blinded by a goddamn deer with a shiny red nose… No, officer, I haven’t been drinking.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

Work from home ain’t for everyone. I, for one, hate when my coworkers try to message when I’m shopping.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Dear brain, please stop thinking so much exactly when it’s time to fall asleep.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

Trying to watch a superhero movie without stressing about the infrastructure damage to the city.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

I will never give another woman my heart until I see how she acts when a bee flies at her.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Pretty sure they’re naming prescription drugs by just grabbing random Scrabble tiles. “Oh hey, Qdilrox sounds good.”

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

Sex is great, but have you ever had your alarm go off and then realize you don’t have to get up today?

Just landed via Facebook:

I never argue, I just explain why I’m right.

Live now on Snapchat:

Don’t be boring. Create the gossip you would like to hear.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

The only thing I miss all day is my bed.

Just landed via Discord:

That feeling when it’s Friday, you blink once, and somehow it’s Monday again.

Making waves on TikTok:

Apple’s secret growth engine: vibe coders paying the $99 Apple Developer Program fee.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

If you’re going to give me some food for thought, it had better be a pizza, or I’m out.

Shared recently on Facebook:

When butterflies fall in love, do they feel humans in their stomachs?

Shared recently on Reddit:

If you’re thinking of becoming a parent, just imagine working 6,570 days straight without a day off.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

You need a twins name suggestion? How about Kate and DupliKate?

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