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11 Funny schedule quotes

Trending Funny Schedule Quotes 🔥

Schedule your appointment early in the month before your dentist starts fretting about their next boat payment.
Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.
I used to schedule naps, but now they’re little surprise parties my body throws at all hours of the day.
Having no one to talk would get you a good sleeping schedule.
Don’t invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.

New funny schedule quotes 👇

6 days ago
Share →: Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

Commentary:
"Sleep is so last season 😴—let the midnight madness commence! 🤪✈️"
2 weeks ago
Share →: Maybe your soulmate’s just late, like, wildly behind schedule.

Commentary:
"Guess my soulmate missed the train… probably stuck in traffic behind a herd of turtles! 🚂🐢😆"
2 months ago
Share →: 9-5 is really 10-2 if you’re working remote.

Commentary:
"9-5 is really 10-2 if you're working remote – where the snooze button becomes your best colleague 😴💻 #RemoteWorkLife"
3 months ago
Share →: Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it’s only Thursday.

Commentary:
"Realizing it's only Thursday on a Friday really puts the 'fry' in 'Friday' 🍟😂 Hang in there, the weekend is just a day away! #ThursdayThoughts"
3 months ago
Share →: I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

Commentary:
Well, that's one way to learn about karma the hard way – waking up at dawn on a holiday! Who knew the universe had such a twisted sense of humor when it comes to work schedules? It seems like karma's alarm clock is set to "early bird gets the regret."
4 months ago
Share →: Don’t invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.

Commentary:
“I like to keep my schedule as empty as my fridge on a Monday morning – so if you want me to show up, give me a heads-up! My plan to do nothing is a serious commitment that requires proper notice!”
4 months ago
Share →: They should invent friends whose schedules line up with yours.

Commentary:
"Ah, the dream of a friend in sync! 🕰️🤝 Imagine the glory of spontaneous hangouts and simultaneous Netflix binges… if only these mythical creatures existed! 🌟 #FriendGoals #WhoNeedsSleepAnyway"
5 months ago
Share →: I used to schedule naps, but now they’re little surprise parties my body throws at all hours of the day.

Commentary:
"Who needs a personal assistant when your body is the master party planner?! 🎉💤 Just when you thought you had your day all planned out, surprise nap party! Your body sure knows how to keep things interesting! 😂 #NapTimeFun"
5 months ago
Share →: Schedule your appointment early in the month before your dentist starts fretting about their next boat payment.

Commentary:
"Secure your spot in the dental chair pronto, unless you want your dentist dreaming more about yachts than your plaque! 🦷⛵️ Don't let procrastination be the root canal of all evil! 😄"
5 months ago
Share →: I’m a total go with the flow kinda person as long as the flow is meticulously scheduled well in advance and there are no mid-flow changes whatsoever.

Commentary:
"Ah, the elusive 'go with the flow' type who really just wants to control the river currents! 🌊🔄 Planning is key, spontaneity is the enemy! ⏰😅 #TypeAFlow"