Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Dear ads, I have the buying power of a Victorian milkmaid.

Commentary:
"Dear ads, I have the buying power of a Victorian milkmaid 🥛💰… Yes, I'll take 10 of those ridiculously priced items. Who needs savings when you've got the charm of an old-timey dairy worker? 💁‍♀️🐄 #ShoppingLikeIts1889"
6 months ago
Share →: Please do not ask a bookworm if they are going to finish the books they have before buying more. It is very offensive in our culture.

Commentary:
"Asking a bookworm if they'll finish their books before buying more is like asking a chef if they'll finish cooking all the meals in their recipe book before trying a new one. Let's not insult their literary appetite! 📚🐛 #BookwormCulture"
6 months ago
Share →: The best time to start a family fight is now. It gets you out of buying relatives gifts.

Commentary:
"Who needs expensive gifts when you have family drama to entertain you? 🎁💥 Let the battle of wills begin, and say goodbye to that holiday shopping list! 😂👊"
6 months ago
Share →: Took the road less travelled after buying the sat nav less expensive.

Commentary:
"Like a GPS with a twist of thriftiness! Taking the road less travelled with a sat nav less expensive is the ultimate budget-friendly adventure 🚗💸 Who needs fancy navigation systems when you've got a sense of direction and a bargain in hand! 😄🗺️ #SavingsGoals"
6 months ago
Share →: Trust my gut? The thing that tricks me into buying gas station sushi and roller dogs? No thanks.

Commentary:
"Trusting my gut has led me to some questionable decisions, like a regrettable rendezvous with gas station sushi and roller dogs 😅🌭🍣 Maybe I'll start listening to my brain instead!"
6 months ago
Share →: Everyone else time traveling: Preventing wars or the spread of disease. Me: Buying multiple pairs of my favorite shoes they’ve stopped making.

Commentary:
"Priorities, am I right? 🕰️👟 Who needs to save the world when you can save your shoe collection instead? #TimeTravelGoals"
6 months ago
Share →: When buying presents I like to think, what would Jesus have got you? So yeah, enjoy your fish sandwich.

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old question: What Would Jesus Buy? 🤔 Turns out, it's fish sandwiches all around! 😄🐟 Bon appétit, my friend! Let the gift of mystery and deliciousness be with you! 🎁🥪"
6 months ago
Share →: Spending money is too easy. For my bank account’s sake, I need a bridge troll to ask me three riddles before I’m allowed to buy something.

Commentary:
💸💡 "In order to protect your precious bank account from the dangers of impulsive spending, why not enlist the services of a wise old bridge troll? Their riddles will keep your wallet safe and your budget in check! Just remember, if the answer to the riddle is 'buy now, buy later, or buy never,' maybe reconsider that purchase! 🌉🧙‍♂️"
6 months ago
Share →: If I win the lottery, I’m buying four politicians and some really nice shoes.

Commentary:
"If I win the lottery, I'm buying four politicians and some really nice shoes. 🤑💼 Because sometimes you need to dress up the chaos with a touch of style and a sprinkle of power! 💸👠 #LifeGoals"
6 months ago
Share →: You’ll be having a good day and then someone your age says they’re buying a house.

Commentary:
"Ah, the carefree days of our youth…until a peer casually drops the news they're entering the realm of adulting with a mortgage 🏠😅 Here's to those of us still mastering the art of not setting off the fire alarm while cooking!"