The potholes in my city will change your radio station and unlock the doors.

The potholes in my city will change your radio station and unlock the doors.

Commentary:
"Who needs a fancy car alarm when you have the ultimate automatic radio DJ and valet service provided by the potholes in town? 🕺🚗🎶 Just sit back, relax, and let the roads take care of your car's entertainment and security needs! 😂 #PotholePerks"

We're living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

We’re living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

Commentary:
"Oh, the struggle is real when the fer-glamour fades away! 🙈 Living in unfergalicious times is like a sad disco without any sparkle or pizzazz! 💃 Let's add some glitter to these dreary days and bring back the fabulousness! ✨"

One day you’re young and carefree and the next, you’re preheating the bathroom before you go in for a shower.

One day you’re young and carefree and the next, you’re preheating the bathroom before you go in for a shower.

Commentary:
Feeling the heat… quite literally! 🔥🚿 Who knew adulthood came with the responsibility of being your own personal bathroom butler? 😂 Embrace the warmth and enjoy the spa-like experience, complete with your very own bathroom butler service! 🛁 #GrownUpStruggles #AdultingAtItsFinest

A hot coffee and a crispy bagel doesn't change anything but it can't hurt.

A hot coffee and a crispy bagel doesn’t change anything but it can’t hurt.

Commentary:
Ah, the power of coffee and carbs – the ultimate duo for life's questionable moments! ☕🥯 Who needs problem-solving skills when you've got a hot coffee and a crispy bagel on your side? They may not fix everything, but hey, at least they'll distract you from the chaos with their deliciousness! 😉 #CoffeeAndBagelToTheRescue

One day you’re hip and cool, and then out of nowhere you say things like hip and cool.

One day you’re hip and cool, and then out of nowhere you say things like hip and cool.

Commentary:
"Life comes at you fast! One moment you're on trend and the next you're aging like fine cheese 🧀 Keep up with the times, or you might just find yourself saying 'groovy' next! 🕺😎"

Interviewer: "What did you learn from your previous job?" Me: "That I need a new job."

Interviewer: “What did you learn from your previous job?” Me: “That I need a new job.”

Commentary:
Interviewer: "What did you learn from your previous job?"
Me: "That I need a new job."

🤣 Looks like the previous job was a crash course in job hunting! 🏹 Good thing this candidate is quick on their feet! #JobHuntingChampion

My wife bought new towels and they’re different colors, so I know the entire color scheme of my house is about to change.

My wife bought new towels and they’re different colors, so I know the entire color scheme of my house is about to change.

Commentary:
Looks like the towels are leading a revolution in your household! 🌈 Time to embrace the new colorful era and bid farewell to your old monochromatic days! 🎨 Who knew towels could hold so much power and influence? 😂🛁#TowelRevolution

Dry January is out. Sopping Wet February is in.

Dry January is out. Sopping Wet February is in.

Commentary:
"Looks like Dry January couldn't weather the storm… Welcome to Sopping Wet February! ☔️💦 Who needs resolutions when you have raindrops to keep you hydrated, right? Let's make a splash this month! 🌧️💧"

This can’t be the same body that used to be able to pull all nighters.

This can’t be the same body that used to be able to pull all nighters.

Commentary:
Oh, how time flies! 👵🌙 Just like a superhero losing their powers, our ability to pull all-nighters vanishes into the abyss of adulthood. 💤🦸‍♂️ It's like our bodies hit the snooze button on staying up late! 😂 #AgingGracefully

Sometimes I miss the time when there was only one idiot per village.

Sometimes I miss the time when there was only one idiot per village.

Commentary:
Ah, the good old days when idiot distribution was a bit more manageable 🤪🏞️ There's definitely a charm to the simplicity of having just one village idiot to deal with!