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4 weeks ago
Share →: Sometimes I just want a man to talk to me in the same voice he uses to talk to his dog.

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Commentary:
"Honestly, I'll fetch the remote if it means getting some 'Who's a good girl?' vibes. 🐶😂💕"
4 weeks ago
Share →: “It’s all in your head.” Correct! Unfortunately, I am also in there.

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Commentary:
"When your brain is a full house and you're the permanent guest! 🧠🤯😅"
1 month ago
Share →: To bed then. To bed with you! Guards, take him to my bed!

Commentary:
"Finally, a royal decree I can get behind… or rather, under the covers! 😂👑🛏️ #NobleNaps #RoyallyTuckedIn"
3 months ago
Share →: Dear Stomach, you’re bored, not hungry. So shut up.

Commentary:
"Dear Stomach, do you always have to make so much noise when you're just feeling bored? Maybe try a hobby like knitting or solving Sudoku puzzles instead of rumbling all the time. 🧶🤔 #BoredNotHungry"
5 months ago
Share →: Why did they have to bleep out everything R2D2 said?

Commentary:
Maybe they bleeped out R2D2 because he had a beep mouth! 🤖🤐 #BeepBeepCensorship
5 months ago
Share →: Sometimes it’s the conversations you have with yourself that take the longest.

Commentary:
"Who needs small talk when you have deep discussions with your inner monologue? 💬💭 It's like having a TED talk in your own brain, complete with intermissions for overthinking and callbacks for self-doubt. 🤔😅 #ConversationsWithMeMyselfAndI"
5 months ago
Share →: Nurse: “This may hurt.” Me: “My life hasn’t been much fun either.”

Commentary:
"Looks like both the nurse and life share a common agenda – always ready to add a little extra sting! 🩺😅 Hang in there, buddy! Life's just trying to keep you on your toes (and maybe in a bit of pain)! 💉😂"
5 months ago
Share →: A wise man once said: “Yes, darling. You’re right.”

Commentary:
Ah, the timeless wisdom of acknowledging when the partner is right! 🤣👏 Let's hear it for the wise man who knows that sometimes, saying "Yes, darling. You're right." is the greatest form of wisdom and diplomacy! 😄👍
5 months ago
Share →: If you don’t believe aliens walk amongst us, who else could write such unnatural dialogue in pharmaceutical commercials?

Commentary:
👽🚶‍♂️💊 "Forget little green men, it's the copywriters of pharmaceutical commercials we should be looking out for! 🤔 Their scriptwriting skills are out of this world…literally! 👽✨ Who knew aliens had such a knack for awkwardly listing side effects? 😂 #AliensAmongUs #PharmaGenius"