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20 Funny double quotes

Funny double quotes are the perfect way to add a splash of humor 😄 and a dash of wit 📝 to your day! Whether you’re sharing laughs with friends or spicing up your posts 📱, these clever sayings bring smiles and giggles galore 😂. Ready to brighten your timeline with some playful word magic? Let’s dive into the world of hilarious double quotes that never fail to entertain! 🎉✨

You’ll pay good money to hear a comedian say something offensive, but when I say it for free, I’m the bad guy.

Posted on1 month ago1 month ago

People out here living double lives, and I’m barely even holding a single life together.

Posted on2 months ago2 months ago

I be like, “Awwwww cows,” and then go and eat two double cheeseburgers, lol.

Posted on3 months ago3 months ago

Reverse cowgirl, so we can both address the elephant in the room.

Posted on3 months ago3 months ago

What base is it when he says, “I know you need it badly,” but he’s talking about sleep?

Posted on3 months ago3 months ago

Sex so good, my left hand is making my right hand a sandwich.

Posted on3 months ago3 months ago

It’s quite ironic that “strap on,” backwards, spells “no parts.”

Posted on3 months ago3 months ago

Reverse cowgirl so he doesn’t see the double chin.

Posted on4 months ago4 months ago

Friendly reminder that double negatives are a big no-no.

Posted on5 months ago5 months ago

Everyone’s gangsta until they spot a double rainbow in the sky.

Posted onMar 20, 2025Mar 20, 2025

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

Posted onMar 18, 2025

Double chins are better than double faces.

Posted onFeb 1, 2025Feb 1, 2025

When Hulk wrecks shit he’s “incredible.” When I do it I’m “causing a scene” and “need to leave this place immediately.”

Posted onJan 27, 2025

I need a stunt double for when I’m navigating my way to the bathroom at night.

Posted onJan 26, 2025

You’re supposed to store a treasure in your cleavage that’s why it’s called a chest.

Posted onJan 26, 2025

People say opposites attract, but I say find a partner who’s deranged in the same ways you are and double your capacity to be annoying.

Posted onJan 25, 2025

My dentist plays country music, so it’s like a double torture.

Posted onJan 25, 2025

If the zombie apocalypse happens we’re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain.

Posted onJan 24, 2025

The worst part about being drunk and seeing double is when you realize it’s just one slice of pizza.

Posted onJan 23, 2025

The quickest way to double your money is to hold it in front of a mirror.

Posted onJan 21, 2025

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