When Hulk wrecks shit he’s “incredible.” When I do it I’m “causing a scene” and “need to leave this place immediately.” Posted on3 days ago
You’re supposed to store a treasure in your cleavage that’s why it’s called a chest. Posted on4 days ago
People say opposites attract, but I say find a partner who’s deranged in the same ways you are and double your capacity to be annoying. Posted on5 days ago
If the zombie apocalypse happens we’re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain. Posted on7 days ago
The worst part about being drunk and seeing double is when you realize it’s just one slice of pizza. Posted on1 week ago