52 Funny free quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Coffee should just be free for anybody over 30.

  Commentary:
  "Because by the time you reach 30, you've already paid enough in sleepless nights and adulting struggles to deserve some caffeine grace ☕️😂 Who's with me on this adulting perk?"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Sleep is a free trial of death but with ads.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the eternal struggle between the desire for rest and the annoyance of interruptions! 😴💤 Imagine trying to peacefully drift into the realm of dreams while being bombarded by ads for dream vacations, fluffy pillows, and noise-canceling earplugs. 🚫📺💰 It's like the ultimate marketing strategy – even in the land of nod, you can't escape the sales pitch! 😂✨ #SleepingWithAds

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Bacon should be free for anyone having a bad day.

  Commentary:
  "Free bacon for the win! Because let's be real, nothing says 'I'm sorry you're having a rough day' quite like the sizzle of crispy perfection 🥓🤤 Who knew pork could be the ultimate mood booster? Bacon: the unsung hero of comfort food!"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Therapy is cool but singing as loud as you can in your car is free.

  Commentary:
  "Therapy is great for the mind, but nothing beats belting out a power ballad in your car for the soul! 🎤🚗 Who needs a therapist when you have your own private concert on wheels, right?"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: God: “Free will was a bad idea. I should have charged for it.”

  Commentary:
  "Well, hindsight is 20/20, even for the Almighty! 💸 Maybe next time, God will offer a 'Free Will Premium Package' with extra perks and maybe a discount code for good deeds. 😂 #DivinePricingStrategy"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I know everything is expensive right now, but just remember correcting people’s grammar online is still free.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs therapy when you can correct grammar and feel superior for free online? Take that, high prices! 💸💁‍♂️ #GrammarPolice"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Toasters aren’t governed by that little dial. They have free will.

  Commentary:
  "Watch out for those rebellious toasters! 🍞🔥 Who knew our breakfast appliances held such power? 😆 Better keep an eye on your toast – you never know when it might decide to assert its independence! 🤖✨"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, then you love a boomerang.

  Commentary:
  "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, then you love a boomerang! 🔄💕 Just make sure it doesn't hit you on the way back… 😉 #LoveLikeABoomerang"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If the line at the grocery store takes longer than 10 minutes, the candy beside the checkout should be free.

  Commentary:
  "Absolutely! Waiting in line for more than 10 minutes should come with a golden ticket 🎫 to Candyland! 🍭 Who knew grocery shopping would turn into a sweet adventure? 😄"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Why are people always so scared of self-checkouts when shopping? It’s much quicker and you always get something for free.

  Commentary:
  "Self-checkouts are like a mini adventure – scanning, bagging, and hoping that bonus item sneaks through without the machine noticing! 🤣🛒 #StealthyShopper #ScanAndDash"

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