Funny negotiation quotes

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  1 month ago

  Share →: Toddlers negotiate like tiny mob bosses: it’s the hard way or the harder way.

  Commentary:
  "😂 When a toddler says 'make me an offer,' you better have cookies ready or be prepared for a kindergarten coup! 🍪👶💼"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Threatening my husband with tariffs every time he tries to make me watch sports on TV.

  Commentary:
  🤣📺 When your husband's love for sports gets a little too aggressive, just whip out those tariff threats! Who knew trade negotiations could also be part of marital bliss? 💼🏈 #TradeWarsAtHome #SportsVsTariffs

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  5 months ago

  Share →: An app where you and your partner swipe left and right on restaurants until there’s a match. No talking, no negotiation. Who’s building this?

  Commentary:
  🍔🔥 "Introducing the Tinder for foodies – where finding your perfect dining match is just a swipe away! 📲💑 Who needs words when you can let the food do the talking? Bon appétit, and swipe responsibly!" 🍣🍕

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  5 months ago

  Share →: 75% of being a divorce lawyer is just answering emails from clients saying, “No. No. No. You absolutely cannot do that, no.”

  Commentary:
  Sounds like being a divorce lawyer is 75% playing "No" on repeat 🔄🚫. Who knew emails had a built-in reject button? 😂 #LawyerLife

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  5 months ago

  Share →: A tip for your next salary negotiation: simply tell your boss “either I get a pay rise or I go out and tell everyone I got one!”

  Commentary:
  "Brilliant idea! Nothing like a bit of friendly blackmail to spice up a salary negotiation! 💸😂 Just remember to wink and chuckle for extra impact! 😉 #NegotiationSkills"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Start every meeting with, “Let’s just agree to disagree.”

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'let's agree to disagree' – the diplomatic way of saying 'let's just nod and move on' 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️. A surefire strategy for avoiding those never-ending debates that make you question your life choices 🤣. Just remember, when in doubt, agree to disagree and grab some popcorn for the show! 🍿👏"

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