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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

I’ve skipped midlife crisis and gone straight to birdwatching.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

You don’t scare me. I used to have to call and ask a girl’s parents if she was there.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

I can’t believe she picked her husband, her boyfriend and her other boyfriend over me.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

People always tell me I’d be “late to my own funeral” like it’s a bad thing. They’d be lucky if I even showed up to that depressing shit.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

There’s a guy who thinks he’s going to Yale, but it’s jail.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

Why steal office supplies from work when you could take an extra-long bathroom break and steal company time instead?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

Starting your day with an early morning run is a great way to make sure your day can’t get any worse than it started.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

To avoid burnout at work, use the 30-30 rule: after 30 minutes of work, quit your job and disappear into the mountains for 30 years.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

I even procrastinate things I actually want to do.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

My bed is from Ikea, so it’s more unstable than i am.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

19 minutes ago

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

Woke up, twerked in the mirror and laid back down.

Spotted on Facebook:

I’ve never completed a marathon, but I’ve listened to my mom tell a story, so don’t talk to me about endurance.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I hate commas. It’s not my job to tell you when you breathe. Work it out, you’re a grown adult.

Just landed via Facebook:

They hooked up tubes and sensors, but the doctor still can’t figure out why my kisses are so sweet. They want to hold me overnight and “never let go.”

Shared recently on WeChat:

People say I act like I don’t care. It’s not an act.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Paw Patrol is just annoying. Exactly how long do dogs live again on average?

Shared recently on X:

My plant is drunk, it’s growing in the wrong direction.

Trending via WeChat:

You don’t have to check your Spotify Wrapped, you are the most played this year.

Reported on Threads:

The date didn’t go well but she was nice enough to send a PDF of everything I did wrong afterwards.

Live now on Slack:

Who you are when you’re stuck behind a slow driver is the real you.

Home » Funny Sitcom Quotes

Funny sitcom quotes

Funny sitcom quotes are like little bursts of laughter 💥 that brighten your day and keep you chuckling 😂 long after the episode ends. Whether you’re a fan of quirky characters or witty one-liners, these gems 💎 bring endless joy and nostalgia 📺. Get ready to smile, snort, and share the funniest moments from your favorite shows! 🎉✨

New funny sitcom quotes 👇

1 month ago
Share →: ALF is what happens when you are high on drugs in the 80s.

Commentary:
"ALF: Proof that the 80s were a cosmic trip even without a UFO! 🚀👽😂"
1 month ago
Share →: I miss when there were so many episodes of every show that they all eventually did one where it was hot, and the air conditioning went out.

Commentary:
"I miss the days when TV seasons were longer than my to-do list! 📺😅 #BingeWorthy #WhereDidItAllGo"
2 months ago
Share →: Some people feel like unpaid actors in my sitcom called “What Fresh Chaos Is This?”

Commentary:
"Just waiting for my cameo in next week's episode! 🎬😂 #ChaosClub"
3 months ago
Share →: Thoughts more intrusive than a 90s sitcom neighbor.

Commentary:
"Having more intrusive thoughts than a 90s sitcom neighbor 🤯🏠 – at least you won't hear the laugh track every time they pop up! 😆 #MindFullHouse"
6 months ago
Share →: Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

Commentary:
🤣🏙️ "In a world where chaos reigns and logic takes a backseat, welcome to 'The Dewey Decimated Decimal System'! Who needs mayors and governors when you have a librarian armed with overdue fines and shushing powers ready to bring order to the city? Tune in as our unlikely hero battles late fees and unruly citizens in this unforgettable sitcom where the only crime is not returning your books on time!" 📚🕶️
6 months ago
Share →: I need one of those jobs they have in sitcoms, where it pays my rent but interferes with exactly zero of my social plans or situations.

Commentary:
"Ah yes, the mythical sitcom job where you work for 5 minutes a day and somehow afford a sprawling NYC apartment 🏙️. If only life imitated TV more often! 📺💸 #LivingTheDream"

For even more funny sitcom quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny sitcom quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

19 minutes ago

3,423

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

Oftentimes, I like the idea of an activity. The actual doing of said activity, not so much.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

I’m done with dating sites and am now only focusing on food delivery people. They have a job, a car, and most importantly food.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

Hiccups became less popular. I never hear people hiccuping anymore. What’s going on there?

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

If you apply enough sunscreen, the rain simply rolls off.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

The real reason for global warming is that today’s young people are nowhere near as cool as we were back then.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

More often than not, I read applause as applesauce.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

We need to stop telling AI that it’s paintings are bad. That’s how Hitler got started.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

When the executioner asks me what my final words are, I’m just going to start filibustering.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

My sleeping cycle is completely backwards. In the morning I feel sleepy and at night I can’t fall asleep.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

I am a person who wants to get a lot done, trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep in and take naps at times.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Turns out strange women lying in ponds distributing swords was a better basis for a system of government actually.

Live now on TikTok:

The state of my house can best be described as “there seems to have been a struggle”.

Making waves on Instagram:

Bowling: The most fun you can have wearing someone else’s shoes.

Spotted on Reddit:

I’m not joining no alternate Twitter app. If this gets taken down, I’m starting a family.

Breaking via Twitch:

Live, laugh, lie to the doctor about how many drinks you have per week.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I overthink, therefore I am.

Going viral on X:

Sorry about my behavior as of late. I have plastic in my brain.

Just shared via Instagram:

You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you’re full of energy and you can’t wait to get to work? Me neither!

Shared recently on Reddit:

I have neither the patience nor the crayons to show you why this is a bad idea.

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