Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Why waste words or gestures when a raised eyebrow is enough to make a statement?

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

My skin is so dry it’s doing a PowerPoint presentation.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

I accidentally hit a parked car, so I left them a note that said “next time it will be you”.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

The shitshow must go on.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie. After a while it won’t feel like you are alone anymore.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

A little mystery is the sweetest seduction.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Some nights I stay up hella late just farting.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

The problem with leading by example is that no one pays attention.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

I have so much planned today that I was already tired thinking of it yesterday.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Getting paid to sleep would be such a dream job.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

509 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,102

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,102

Updated

Dec 24, 2025

Users Online

3,717

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Snapchat:

We decided to have money instead of children.

Trending via Twitch:

User: the word computer professionals use when they mean ‘idiot.’

Making waves on Telegram:

If my family starts talking politics at Thanksgiving, I’m changing the subject by announcing I’m pregnant.

Shared recently on Twitch:

During winter, it’s either lazy starvation or eight thousand calories in one sitting.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Taking yesterday’s bad mood on a multi-day tour.

Just landed via Discord:

Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread and put it back in the bag.

Making waves on X:

You okay, babe? You’ve hardly touched the promises you made me.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I’m bored, but not “read a book for fun” bored.

Just shared via Discord:

“Yeah no” is my favorite combo.

More funny quotes 👇

The actors you see in movies are probably home by now.

0

1 week ago

actor, actors, home, humor, joke, movie
After a quick review of my finances, everyone is going to have to be happy with a forehead kiss for Christmas.

0

1 week ago

after, Christmas, everyone, finance, finances, forehead, forehead kiss, gift, going, happy, holiday, humor, kiss, money, quick, review
As funny as it sounds, the easiest way to get women is by having a girlfriend.

0

1 week ago

dating, Funny, girlfriend, having, humor, irony, relationship, sounds, woman, women
Being a little older, I am very fortunate to have someone call and check on me every day. He’s from India, and he’s very concerned about my car warranty.

0

1 week ago

age, am, being, call, car, car warranty, check, check-up, day, every, humor, i, India, little, me, older, older age, phone, phone call, scam, scam call, someone, telemarketing, warranty
I don’t even want a new year this year. I’ll take a lightly used 2006, if it’s available.

0

1 week ago

2006, available, date, even, humor, i, new, new year, nostalgia, sarcasm, take, time, used, want, year
Three wise men? I highly doubt that.

0

1 week ago

doubt, humor, i, joke, man, men, sarcasm, skepticism, three, wise, Wise Man
“Some things are better left unsaid,” I think to myself immediately after I hit send.

0

1 week ago

after, better, communication, confession, hit, humor, i, left, media, message, mistake, myself, regret, self-talk, send, social, social media, texting, things, think, unsaid
Can the AI bubble just pop already? Everyone hates this crap.

0

1 week ago

AI, bubble, culture, everyone, frustration, hate, internet, internet culture, just, pop, sarcasm, technology, trend
No, you’re not a “prompt engineer,” you’re a sloperator.

0

1 week ago

engineer, humor, job, job title, joke, prompt, prompt engineer, sloperator, title, wordplay
If you’re a man and don’t feel well or are going through something tough, just remember no one cares.

0

1 week ago

feel, feeling, feeling unwell, going, humor, indifference, just, love, man, remember, something, through, time, tough, tough love, tough time, unwell, well

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on X this month:

I always carry a knife with me in case I run into someone with 10,000 spoons.

48 shares on YouTube this month:

Why can’t opportunity just come back later?

38 shares on WeChat this month:

Touch my butt, not my coffee.

32 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

76 shares on Snapchat this month:

Running feels great until you compare it to not running.

85 shares on Snapchat this month:

Remember, when asking for a raise, it is considered customary to be sober.

81 shares on Threads this month:

I’m so talented I can not only spill food on my clothes but I can get it on yours too.

93 shares on Slack this month:

Iced coffee and crying, the most Californian afternoon.

69 shares on Pinterest this month:

Congratulations to the sweater, another year of being the most disgustingly named piece of clothing.

93 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you breakdance you buy dance.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

It’s time for basic human empathy to make a comeback.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

The worst part about borrowing money is having to pay it back or move to a new city.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

I love being a girly girl and going to sleep all moisturized, juicy, and soft. Lip balm on. Layering on scents just to beauty rest.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Waiting for toast to toast takes forever unless you walk away for 10 seconds, then it burns.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

Welcome to adulthood: 9pm is midnight now.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

I’m so vulnerable to nostalgia. The sun will go down and I’ll be like: “Wow… remember when the sun was up… I miss who I was then”

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

He likes when I shakalaka, so, woop, there it is.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

Spotify Wrapped, but for all your bad decisions this year.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

You can’t convince me that 2020 didn’t open a portal to hell that we’re still living in.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Threads:

Sunsets and women are undoubtedly God’s best creations.

Spotted on X:

“We will go ahead and make these changes if we don’t hear from you before Friday” is such an elegant way to solve problems.

Spotted on Snapchat:

So many songs that tell you to throw your hands in the air like you just don’t care, so few about the hazards of ceiling fans.

Live now on Snapchat:

Giving out false information so I know who the leak is.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Imagine if we had to worry about dinosaurs too, on top of everything else.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Big fan of calling artists their first name and then the band name as their last name.

Breaking via Facebook:

Due to inflation, a picture is now worth 2300 words.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

The only joke my mom ever made was me.

Seen just now on Slack:

Who can better express pain and grief and misery than a man with a harmonica?

Spotted on Discord:

My life is simple, I see a queue of more than 6 people, I go home.

Activity Log ✨

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨