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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

If you don’t know how many x-rays it takes before a person develops super powers, should you really be in a medical profession?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

Piñatas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

I wish British people had subtitles so I knew what they are on about.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Someone at my job mentioned severance, and I was like, “Oh my God, I love that show,” and they said, “No, I’m about to get fired.”

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

Hey girl, are you a burger? Because I love you.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

People who own banana costumes will wear that shit to anything.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

I’ve decided that I’m going to underthink today.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

Most men don’t actually want to do things; they just want to talk about doing them.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

These days, I only use Facebook as a birthday calendar.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

I’m at an age where, when I’m tying my shoes, I think about what else I can do while I’m down here.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

508 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,101

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,101

Updated

Dec 23, 2025

Users Online

3,606

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on YouTube:

Good morning to everyone except the people who are missing the ability to read the room.

Going viral on Slack:

Getting paid to sleep would be such a dream job.

Seen just now on Twitch:

If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Everybody say a little prayer for my husband, he just told me to calm down.

Just landed via TikTok:

Thinking of becoming the “where’s my hug” guy in prison.

Spotted on YouTube:

I’m actually really good looking if you don’t look at me.

Going viral on TikTok:

I’m sorry I lied to you. I only did it for material gain. And to cause you psychological harm. And to prove I’m smarter than you.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

How do they know an animal is extinct? Like, have you really looked everywhere?

Breaking via Facebook:

I’m not into casual sex. Send me a résumé.

Making waves on Instagram:

Picking up the hem of my baggy pants to walk up the stairs like it’s a ballgown.

Home » Funny Age Quotes » Page 8

379 Funny age quotes

More funny age quotes 👇

I’m a kid at heart and a senior citizen at my knees and back.

0

1 month ago

age, age contrast, aging, back, citizen, contrast, heart, humor, kid, knees, self-deprecating, senior, youth
You’re old if you’re excited to learn how to play Mahjong.

0

1 month ago

activity, age, excited, excitement, fun, fun activity, game, humor, learn, learning, Mahjong, old, play
Thanks to AI, some of us went from being told by our parents not to trust the internet to having to tell our parents not to trust the internet.

0

1 month ago

age, AI, being, digital, digital age, gap, generational, generational gap, having, humor, internet, irony, parents, technology, tell, thanks, told, trust, us
I see people my age out there climbing mountains and skydiving, and here I am feeling good about myself because I got my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.

0

1 month ago

achievement, age, aging, am, balance, climbing, comedy, confidence, daily, daily life, feeling, good, got, here, humor, humor about aging, i, leg, life, life perspective, losing, myself, people, perspective, relatability, self-deprecation, skydiving, through, underwear
I am at the age where I question throwing away a box because, “It’s a really nice box.”

0

1 month ago

age, am, away, box, clutter, decision making, hoarding, humor, i, nice, perspective, question, sentimentality, storage, throwing, where
Welcome to your 40s—you run out of breath trying to find your running shoes.

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1 month ago

40s, age, aging, breath, breathlessness, fitness, humor, middle, middle age, run, running, sh, trying, welcome
Ever since I turned 20, someone is always in Japan or Italy. Is it like this forever?

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1 month ago

20, age, always, curiosity, ever, forever, future, humor, i, Italy, Japan, long-term, someone, travel, turned, world, world travel
How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

0

1 month ago

age, age humor, aging, humor, impatience, joke, kick, life, life joke, old, older, still, thing, waiting, wisdom, wise
I’ve had 50 birthdays in a row without being arrested, which I’d say is an impressive streak!

0

1 month ago

50, age, arrest, arrested, being, birthday, celebration, humor, ID, impressive, row, say, streak
At 20, I was unstoppable; at 30, I’m just unstartable.

0

1 month ago

20, 30, adulthood, age, humor, i, just, life, transition, unstartable, unstoppable

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Social Media Stars ⭐

56 shares on X this month:

The devil couldn’t reach me so he made sure my love life was bullshit.

43 shares on TikTok this month:

Don’t let the fact that I’m deeply unserious distract you from the fact that you’re in the presence of a genius.

100 shares on Threads this month:

Why can’t the house clean itself? It seems to get dirty by itself.

95 shares on Telegram this month:

Thanksgiving ain’t been the same ever since my uncle pulled that gun out on everybody.

88 shares on LinkedIn this month:

How do they know an animal is extinct? Like, have you really looked everywhere?

88 shares on Messenger this month:

You misunderstood me. I said I was a “bawler,” not a “baller.” You know, someone who cries a lot.

18 shares on Instagram this month:

Stop rushing in the morning. You’re starting your day in panic mode.

20 shares on Telegram this month:

If you can figure out how to configure your default state to be slightly amused rather than slightly annoyed, you pretty much enter God Mode.

99 shares on Snapchat this month:

Don’t tell me about your wild weekend. My TV remote died and I switched the batteries around, and now it’s working.

14 shares on TikTok this month:

My ducks may not be in a row, but at least they’re having fun. Your ducks probably hate you for making them line up like that.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

I’m chronically online in a different and more sophisticated way than you are.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

If you’re a man and don’t feel well or are going through something tough, just remember no one cares.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Some people’s high horses are actually donkeys.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Can’t stand British posts on my timeline. “I bought this for four squids and a halfpenny!” What the hell are you talking about?

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Adulthood is just saying “it is what it is,” and then crying in your car to a song from 2012.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

It sucks when a woman realizes that her knight in shining armor was actually just a moron wrapped in tinfoil.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

Today’s book recommendation: “The Art of Silence” by the famous Chinese philosopher Shut-Up.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

I think fathers lose their mind a little bit when they realize their daughters aren’t as forgiving as their wives.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

If she wants the moon, you get her the moon.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has copied:

I keep screenshots the way my husband keeps old cords, stored neatly away until the day I might need them.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Telegram:

Rather than work on my issues, I’m counting on my personality getting changed by a falling coconut.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

And then the vodka whispered, “Say what you really think.”

Just shared via WeChat:

I mean, sex is all right, but have you ever experienced the sheer sensuality of having rock-solid proof that a problem at work was someone else’s fault, even though it really, really looked like it was yours?

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I’m so high at Home Depot right now, and I have to ask where the hose at. And I know I’mma laugh when I do.

Breaking via YouTube:

I think the key to happiness is having plenty of money and then telling all the poor people that money can’t buy happiness.

Just landed via Discord:

You okay, babe? You’ve hardly touched the promises you made me.

Live now on X:

I’m a bit of a traditionalist, so on my birthday, I smear my body with embryonic fluid.

Trending via Telegram:

I’m not like other teenagers, I’m 51.

Just shared via Telegram:

It’s okay if you don’t like me, not everyone has good taste.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Sometimes uncontrollable laughter is all you need to get the millions of thoughts out of your head.

Activity Log ✨

379 Funny age quotes

More funny age quotes 👇

All funny age quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨