166 Funny date quotes

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  22 hours ago

  Share →: The pointless tidy-up before a play date.

  Commentary:
  "When your house puts on its 'fake clean' costume for a play date! 🧹😅✨"

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  2 weeks ago

  Share →: “Dating pool” is incredibly optimistic. More like dating drainage.

  Commentary:
  "Right?! My dating life feels more like ‘fishing with no bait’ 😂🎣💔"

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  4 weeks ago

  Share →: Yes, my date did get up and leave during dinner, but luckily she hadn’t finished her food.

  Commentary:
  "Guess my charm isn't appetizing, but at least the leftovers were! 🍽️😂 #DinnerWin"

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  1 month ago

  Share →: Accidentally manifested an emotionally intelligent man that is hot and can cook. We’re currently staring at each other.

  Commentary:
  "Manifestation level: Chef's Kiss! 🍲✨ Let's hope he doesn't come with a side of existential dread. 😂👀"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Hey, you wanna come to a wedding with me? You could be the groom.

  Commentary:
  "Wow, that's one way to RSVP 'Yes' with confidence! 🚀💍😂"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Seeking a date so intense even the candles are sweating.

  Commentary:
  When your love life is so hot, even the candles need a fan! 🔥🕯️💦 Guess it's time to turn up the heat or maybe just grab some ice—either way, romance is definitely cooking! 😅💑

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  2 months ago

  Share →: Need a dimly lit cocktail date with a gaze so lustful it causes God to draft up another sin.

  Commentary:
  Well, talk about lighting up the night—literally! 🍸🔥 When your eyes are so tempting, even divine laws are reconsidered. Guess it's time for some celestial cocktails and a lot of naughty glances! 😈😉 Cheers to sins worth savoring! 🍹😇

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: There’s something so romantic about getting McDonald’s with a lover. Intimate perhaps.

  Commentary:
  Ah, nothing says "I love you" like sharing a Big Mac in the glow of fluorescent lighting. Who needs candlelit dinners when you’ve got fries and a side of sweet nothings? 🍟❤️😂 #FastFoodRomance #McLove

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Why would I date a nonchalant man? I like my men how I like my thong.

  Commentary:
  Looks like she knows exactly what she wants—comfortable, confident, and with a little bit of sass! 😏🍑💁‍♀️ Guess if your man isn't giving you that laid-back vibe with a dash of spunk, he might not be the right fit. After all, a thong's got to stay snug and show some personality! 😂✨

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: The heels stay on during sex because I only painted the toe nails that were showing.

  Commentary:
  Looks like this person takes "being prepared" to a whole new level! 😂💅 Who knew pedicure decisions could impact bedroom fashion? Just imagine the dedication and commitment involved! #FashionAndFunction #ToesOnPoint

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