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Funny drinks quotes are the perfect way to add a splash of humor 🍹 and a twist of wit 🍸 to any gathering or social scroll 📱. Whether you’re toasting with friends or just sipping solo, these clever sayings bring laughter 😂 and good vibes 🥳 to every sip. Get ready to raise your glass 🥂 and chuckle your way through happy hour!

New funny drinks quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: Mocktails are awesome because they ask the question ‘how much could juice cost?’

Commentary:
🍹 "Mocktails are the ultimate juice detectives – solving the mystery of pricey drinks one fruity concoction at a time! Who knew investigating a beverage could be this refreshing and affordable? Cheers to mocktails for reminding us that sometimes the best things in life are just a squeeze away from being free!" 🕵️‍♂️🍊 #JuicyInvestigations #MocktailMysteries
5 months ago
Share →: Santa: “Don’t leave me milk. Leave me whiskey.”

Commentary:
Looks like Santa is trading his milk and cookies for something a bit stronger this year! 🎅🥃 Who knew St. Nick was into the hard stuff? Maybe that's the real secret behind his jolly demeanor! 😄🍪
5 months ago
Share →: Bartenders be like “here’s that receipt, I’ll go ahead and put it on the wettest part of the bar”.

Commentary:
🍹🤣 Oh, bartenders, masters of the wet receipt placement strategy! Watch as they delicately balance it on the wettest spot of the bar, offering you a paper souvenir infused with a splash of character. It's like a secret initiation into the quirky world of drink receipts. Cheers to the unsung heroes of the bar who always keep us on our toes! 🍺🤪
6 months ago
Share →: Opening a Star Wars pub called Bar Bar Binks.

Commentary:
How about, "May the drinks be with you at Bar Bar Binks, where you can sip on drinks from a galaxy far, far away! 🍻🌌 #StarWarsCantina"
6 months ago
Share →: Because it is Friday, I will allow one beautiful woman to invite me for drinks.

Commentary:
"Ah, the power of Fridays – turning a casual drink invitation into a grand, generous gesture 😄🍸 One lucky lady gets the honor of buying the drinks today! Cheers to the weekend shenanigans and unexpected invitations!"
6 months ago
Share →: A web developer and an SEO expert walk into a bar, bars, nightclub, pubs, tavern, beer, alcohol, drinks, alcoholic beverages, bars in my area, places to drink.

Commentary:
Looks like the web developer is keen on expanding their search query optimization skills everywhere they go! 🕵️‍♂️🔍 Meanwhile, the SEO expert is probably already eyeing up the bar's meta tags and keyword density for a potential improvement project. 🍻💻 Cheers to a night of optimizing and imbibing in equal measure! 🍹💻🚀
6 months ago
Share →: A camel walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey, you can’t bring your own drinks in here!”

Commentary:
Looks like that camel really knows how to take happy hour into its own hands! 🐪🍸 Bet he just wanted a hump-day cocktail! 🐪🍹 Hope he doesn't get the "hump" over this mix-up! 🤣🍷
6 months ago
Share →: I know I’m almost 40 because I had a few drinks last night and woke up this morning thinking: Oh no I bought so many socks online last night.

Commentary:
"Well, at least you'll have cozy feet to comfort you in your mid-life crisis 😄🧦 #SocksOverStress #RetailTherapy"
6 months ago
Share →: Coke Zero sounds like a government pledge to eliminate fizzy drinks by 2030.

Commentary:
"Looks like Coke Zero is playing the long game with its ambitious plan to rid the world of fizzy drinks by 2030 🥤🚫 Better stock up on your favorite sodas now before they disappear into the fizz-tory books! 😄"
6 months ago
Share →: The first two drinks don’t count if you have social anxiety, they just turn you into a normal person.

Commentary:
"Ah, the magical transformative powers of liquid courage! 🍹✨ Here to help us all conquer social anxiety, one drink at a time. Bottoms up, introverts! 🥂😅 #CheersToNormalcy"