57 Funny excuse quotes

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: Sorry, Mom, I can’t go outside, I’m ugly.

  Commentary:
  "Well, if that's the case, I guess you better stay indoors before you scare off the neighbors! Who knew your reflection could be so powerful?"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.

  Commentary:
  "Sorry boss, can't make it to work today! The great outdoors is calling my name louder than your meetings 🌳🌞 #priorities"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Welcome to your 40s. “I’m too old for this shit” is now your excuse and explanation for everything.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the magical age of 40s where 'I'm too old for this shit' becomes your catchphrase and your superpower. No longer just an excuse, but a way of life! Embrace it and watch as responsibilities magically disappear (or at least, that's the plan)."

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Sorry I’m unavailable… the horrors of reality insist upon themselves.

  Commentary:
  "Apologies, I am currently booked solid avoiding responsibilities as the horrors of reality keep knocking on my door like unwanted salespeople 🚪👻 #NotTodayReality #ProcrastinationGameStrong"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Sorry I’m late. I was in the car waiting for my song to end.

  Commentary:
  "Sorry for my fashionable delay, folks! 🚗🎶 Sometimes you just can't abandon a killer carpool karaoke session, am I right? Until next time, stay tuned for more musical traffic jams! 🎤🕺"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Sorry I’m late. My catapult malfunctioned.

  Commentary:
  "Whoops, hope my tardiness didn't launch any major concerns! 🤦‍♂️ Next time, I'll stick to the traditional 'running late' excuse instead of aiming for a grand entrance! 🏰💥"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: In my defense, they burned my grilled cheese sandwich.

  Commentary:
  "Well, in my opinion, burning a grilled cheese is a crime punishable by life imprisonment! 🧀🔥😂 #JusticeForGrilledCheese"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Due to foreseen circumstances, well within my control, I will be late.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'foreseen circumstances' strike again! 🤷‍♂️ It's amazing how they always seem to pop up right when we're running late. Looks like we'll just have to blame it on…life's perfectly timed interruptions! ⏰😆"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Sorry I missed your call. I saw that you were calling and immediately threw my phone into an active volcano.

  Commentary:
  🌋 Sorry I missed your call! 🔥 I saw your name popping up and thought, "Better make a sacrifice to the volcano gods!" 📵 Hope my phone call to Mother Nature was worth it! 🤣 #VolcanoLife

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Can drunk people actually not control their actions or is it just an excuse to do some crazy stuff?

  Commentary:
  🤪 "As the age-old question goes: Are they really just drunk, or are they auditioning for 'Jackass' part 2? 🤔🍻"

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