Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Me before grocery shopping: only healthy foods, no impulse buys, I can do this. Me during grocery shopping: they make chocolate filled marshmallows?

Commentary:
"Grocery shopping: where good intentions meet chocolate-filled marshmallows 🍫🤷‍♂️ Who can resist a delicious detour down the snack aisle? Just blame it on the 'grocery store temptation'! 😅"
6 months ago
Share →: I feel for my kids, who had to take in the groceries and put them away today. They may never recover from this traumatic experience.

Commentary:
Oh, the horror! 🛒💪🏼😱 It was a struggle of epic proportions for those brave souls. Post-grocery drama therapy may be necessary to heal the wounds of captured snacks and boxed goods! 😂🍎 #ParentingProblems #HardKnockLife
6 months ago
Share →: I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store.

Commentary:
"Who needs a luxurious vacation when you can experience the thrill of aisle navigation and the excitement of unexpected sales at the grocery store? 🌟💸 Just back from the ultimate adventure, living on the edge in the produce section! 🍇🥑 #LivingTheHighLife"
6 months ago
Share →: I don’t always carry all the groceries on one arm, but when I do, my keys are in the wrong pocket.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic grocery shopping struggle – a balancing act worthy of a circus performer! 🤹‍♂️ Who needs multitasking skills when you can just challenge yourself to locate those elusive keys in the wrong pocket instead? 🤦‍♂️ Remember, smooth grocery transport is an art form! 🛒🔑"
6 months ago
Share →: Chip bags should be clear, show me what you want me to pay $6 for, cowards.

Commentary:
"Seriously, chip companies, we deserve to see what we're getting ourselves into! 😂💸 Transparent bags for transparent snacking, am I right? Let's see those chips in all their glory, no more hiding behind glossy packaging! 💪🥔 #ShowUsTheChips"
6 months ago
Share →: In my 20’s: might hit the club tonight. In my 40’s: might go to the grocery store to listen to some bangers.

Commentary:
Ah, the evolution of partying… 🕺🏼🛒 Who needs clubs when you can vibe to the sweet tunes of the produce aisle? 🎧🥦 Just imagine busting a move while picking out avocados! The grocery store is the new nightclub for the sophisticated palate. 💃🛒 #GroceryStoreGoals
6 months ago
Share →: Diet hack: Spend your money filling up your gas tank so you won’t have money for groceries.

Commentary:
"Who needs groceries when you can have a full tank of gas to drive away from your hunger pains? 🚗💨 #GasIsTheNewGroceries"
6 months ago
Share →: Accidentally made eye contact with the sweets at the grocery store and now have to declare bankruptcy.

Commentary:
"Who knew those sweets had such powerful eye contact game? 💸🍭 But hey, bankruptcy is just a small price to pay for a moment of sugary temptation, right? 😂 #SweetToothProblems"
6 months ago
Share →: Went to the grocery store hungry. I didn’t need to pay rent this month anyway.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic mistake of going to the grocery store hungry. Who needs a roof over their head when you've got a cart full of snacks, am I right? 💸🛒 #FoodOverRent"
6 months ago
Share →: I don’t want to party like it’s 1999, I want to go grocery shopping like it is.

Commentary:
Who needs a wild night out when you can get the excitement of scoring a great deal on avocados at the grocery store? 🥑🛒 Forget about dancing the night away, I'm ready to stroll down the aisles in style! Meet me at the produce section, it's where all the real action is happening. 🤣 #GroceryShoppingGoals