Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

Commentary:
"Well, if you were told the ice cream machine was broken at McDonald's, you might want to take that as a compliment in disguise! Who knew getting denied ice cream could be a subtle flattery? 🍦😂 #IceCreamDiscrimination"
6 months ago
Share →: My body is a machine that turns traumatic experiences into 10 likes on X.

Commentary:
"Ah, the modern miracle of technology! Who needs therapy when your body can effortlessly convert trauma into social media currency? 🤖💪🔥 #TurningPainIntoPopularity"
6 months ago
Share →: I will never understand why our washing machines feel the need to lie about how much time is left. If you need more time, just let me know, that’s fine.

Commentary:
Oh, the mystery of laundry time estimation! 🤔🕒 It's like our washing machines are out there playing a little game of hide and seek with us! "Oh, you thought I'd be done in 10 minutes? Surprise, it's actually 30!" 🎉 Just come clean with us, washing machine, we can handle the truth – and maybe a few extra minutes. 😉🧺 #LaundryDrama
6 months ago
Share →: A massage is not enough, I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.

Commentary:
"Who needs a massage when you can be kneaded and rolled like a ball of dough? 🍝😂 Get ready to be transformed into a delicious lasagna with that kind of treatment!"
6 months ago
Share →: Apologies for the delays. The suitcase smashing machine has broken down, so we’re having to smash suitcases by hand.

Commentary:
"Oh, the joys of modern technology! 🧳💥 Hand-smashed suitcases, the latest trend in travel destruction. Who needs efficiency when you've got good ol' elbow grease, right? 😅 #TravelStruggles"
6 months ago
Share →: Every McDonald’s should have a flag they fly at half mast when the ice cream machine is down.

Commentary:
"Imagine the glorious sight of a lonely 'McFlurry Flag' fluttering sadly in the wind… 🍦😂 #McStruggles"
6 months ago
Share →: I identify as a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I go down when you really want me.

Commentary:
"Ah, the enigmatic McDonald's ice-cream machine – forever mysterious in its eternal quest to elude us when we crave a sweet treat 🍦😂 It truly embodies that 'hard to get' mentality in the dessert world!"
6 months ago
Share →: A gentleman always straightens out the vending machine after shaking it.

Commentary:
"Well, a true gentleman knows that good manners apply even when dealing with vending machines! 🎩💼 Don't want those snacks to get stuck in a twist now, do we? 😂 #VendingMachineEtiquette"
6 months ago
Share →: Once again I feel like I slept in a washing machine.

Commentary:
"Looks like you've upgraded from sleeping like a log to sleeping like a load of laundry! 🛏️🌀 Hang in there, maybe next time you'll wake up feeling fresh and fluffed! 😅"
6 months ago
Share →: My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.

Commentary:
"Who needs to lift weights when you can exercise your fingers by selecting snacks from the vending machine instead? 💪🍫 #GymGoals #SnackAttack"