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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

I thought Game of Thrones was a pooping contest for men.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

The world is such a beautiful place when you don’t think too hard about it or look around.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

Marry the man who treats your dumb questions like they’re NASA-level problems.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

Due to personal reasons, I’ll be getting stronger every day.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

The problem with salad is, it’s salad.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

My favorite game is guessing if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor posture, or a brain tumor.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Maybe if we sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

Being called by your real name in a relationship kinda sounds like a divorce.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

I’ve heard that people who don’t have Facebook use their free time to lie naked on top of each other. Ew, imagine that.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,364

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

Caesar, looking shocked: “Is it bring your knife to work day or something?”

Making waves on X:

Sex before marriage is a sin unless you do it doggy style, because all dogs go to heaven. Follow me for more biblical loopholes.

Going viral on X:

Coke tastes like tapping into your ancient ancestral petroleum reserves, while Sprite tastes like being connected to a big, beautiful energy grid.

Making waves on TikTok:

That depressing moment when you pull up to work and the building is not engulfed in flames.

Spotted on Messenger:

Nephew showed me his toys on FaceTime, and I had no toys to show him back. Humiliating.

Making waves on YouTube:

People who own banana costumes will wear that shit to anything.

Going bananas on X:

Waiting in the grocery store parking lot for the rotisserie chickens to be ready. The thrill of the hunt.

Going viral on Threads:

A bathrobe is being naked with plausible deniability and pockets.

Spotted on Instagram:

If you’re happy and you know it, you’re clearly not paying enough attention.

Trending via Twitch:

Іf Empire Strikes Back isn’t a Christmas movie, then why is there so much snow in it?

1112 Funny people quotes

More funny people quotes 👇

Stop letting people who are going to hell bother you.

1 month ago

advice, bother, going, hell, humor, letting, people, stop
People pleasers aren’t kind. They’re afraid.

1 month ago

afraid, behavior, emotion, fear, kind, kindness, people, people pleaser, personality, pleaser, social, social behavior
People without a sense of humor should not be allowed to decide what people with a sense of humor are allowed to laugh at.

1 month ago

allowed, censorship, decide, decision, freedom, freedom of speech, humor, laugh, laughter, people, sense, sense of humor, should, speech
Do people with lip filler know that they look like that?

1 month ago

appearance, beauty, cosmetic, cosmetic procedure, filler, humor, know, lip, lip filler, people, procedure, self-awareness
When I was a kid, they played lame music for middle-aged people in the supermarket, but this morning at Whole Foods, it’s now all amazing bangers from my youth.

1 month ago

age, amazing, bangers, foods, funny observation, generation, i, kid, lame, middle, middle age, morning, music, nostalgia, observation, people, played, supermarket, whole, Whole Foods, youth
There will be people in your life that say you have too many books. Those are not your people.

1 month ago

advice, book, books, collection, friendship, humor, life, people, reading, say, too
People used to fly kites. Glad that’s over with.

1 month ago

activity, fly, fly kite, glad, humor, kite, nostalgia, over, past, past activity, people, sarcastic, sarcastic humor, used
I will never understand people who don’t gasp dramatically at rainbows.

1 month ago

drama, emotion, gasp, humor, i, nature, never, people, rainbow, reaction, understand
When old people say, “Long as you happy,” that means you’re pretty dumb.

1 month ago

age, age gap, communication, dumb, gap, happiness, happy, humor, means, misunderstanding, old, old person, people, person, pretty, say, slang
It’s funny how people without pizzas in their hands actually think I’ll answer my door.

1 month ago

actually, answer, delivery, door, food, Funny, hands, humor, joke, people, pizza, think, visitor

For even more funny people quotes, hit next 👇

All funny people quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on Pinterest this month:

I love how this generation broke the previous misconception that “people with tattoos can’t get good jobs” and now we all agree that “people with and without tattoos can’t get good jobs”.

25 shares on Twitch this month:

I asked myself if I was toxic and we said no.

40 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If you would like to get an idea of what an exorcism is like, try putting clothes on a toddler.

61 shares on X this month:

Baby, we believe in God around here, I don’t care what’s trending these days.

82 shares on Threads this month:

Should be able to shazam the inner yearnings of my heart.

42 shares on Pinterest this month:

So tired of looking in my wallet and not finding $10,000

91 shares on Telegram this month:

I need a reasonable job. Something like $3,000 an hour. Nothing too wild.

55 shares on Slack this month:

You can’t confuse me. I already don’t know what’s going on.

99 shares on Discord this month:

No one talks about how uncomfortable it is to ask for your own money back.

38 shares on Twitch this month:

Next time I die, I’m going to make sure I’m reincarnated someplace other than Earth.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

Got a botched circumcision, now my willy wonka.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

If my calculator had a history, it would be more embarrassing than my browser history.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

I don’t get vegetables on my pizza because I don’t like mixing business with pleasure.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Once you find a pair of pants that fit you perfectly, it’s over for all your other pants.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

I deliberately don’t go to bed early. I don’t want to look like I could be useful for anything the next day.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

I already know how it will end. One of my children will unplug my life support to charge their phone.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

If you love me, please don’t ask me to go camping with you.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a break after sending one email.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

Parenting a teenager is surreal because you’ll be sitting there, and some dude who is much taller than you will walk around the corner and ask you how to open a popcorn bag.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

Been whispering “I like invented her” about my newborn every few hours.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Twitch:

Putting sunscreen on kids feels like cardio.

Shared recently on Slack:

No camera can do justice to a landscape that melts your heart.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Respect people who wear glasses because they paid money to see you.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Once you realize that the general public is retarded, you stop caring about how crazy you look to them.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Sometimes I use big words I don’t always fully understand, in an effort to make myself sound more photosynthesis.

Seen just now on Messenger:

We should be able to call in healthy: “I feel amazing today, and I’m not wasting it at work.”

Going viral on Facebook:

The way my phone’s facial recognition pretends not to recognize me, you’d think I dated it.

Shared recently on Telegram:

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep, not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

Just landed via Slack:

My head is starting to get dented from hitting rock bottom so often.

Spotted on Reddit:

If you can’t laugh at yourself, I will.

Activity Log ✨

1112 Funny people quotes

More funny people quotes 👇

All funny people quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨