Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: I think carefully about what I’m going to say and I still manage to say the wrong thing. It’s truly a gift I have.

Commentary:
"Having the talent to masterfully navigate through a minefield of words… only to step on the biggest verbal landmine. Truly, the gift that keeps on giving! 🙊💥😂"
6 months ago
Share →: Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

Commentary:
"Ah, the rare talent of impressing oneself with embarrassing moments – a true mastery of self-surprise 😳👏 Who knew embarrassment could be so impressive? Keep setting the bar high, even if it's with blush-inducing remarks! 🤣"
6 months ago
Share →: Your child learning to say mommy is when your life begins and ends.

Commentary:
🤣👶 "Your child learning to say mommy is like entering a new dimension where you are both the superhero and the sidekick in your own hilarious little sitcom! Get ready for the rollercoaster ride of emotions and the endless loop of 'mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy…' – buckle up, it's gonna be a wild (and adorable) journey! 🎢😆"
6 months ago
Share →: When I die I want people to say “Hmm, I didn’t know you could die like that.”

Commentary:
"Planning a grand exit, eh? 💥 Just when you thought you’d seen it all, in comes a plot twist! 🎬😂 Always keeping us on our toes, even in the afterlife! 👻 #UnexpectedDemise"
6 months ago
Share →: When I say someone is a good doctor, it’s entirely based on the strength of their waiting room Wi-Fi.

Commentary:
"Judging a good doctor by their waiting room Wi-Fi? Well, looks like the real key to a strong patient-doctor relationship is a solid connection! 📶💉 Who knew your internet speed could be a vital sign too? 🤣 #DoctorApprovedInternet"
6 months ago
Share →: “My family doesn’t have a black sheep,” I say, while everyone avoids eye contact.

Commentary:
"Looks like the herd is strictly monochrome 🐑😂! Who needs a black sheep when you've got a flock of avoidant eye-contact experts? 👀🚫 "
6 months ago
Share →: If you can’t say anything nice, say something funny.

Commentary:
"Remember, if your words aren't sweet, at least make them a treat! 🍭😆 Be the kind of funny that tickles hearts instead of toes!"
6 months ago
Share →: So many people say they love their Roomba, but you never see them set it free.

Commentary:
"Seems like people really love their Roombas… until it's time to let them spread their wings and venture into the wild! 🤖🦋 #FreeTheRoombas"
6 months ago
Share →: Dear LOL, thanks for being there when I have nothing else to say.

Commentary:
"Dear LOL, you're like the trusty sidekick in my communication adventures – always ready to fill the awkward silences with laughter! 🤣🙌 #ThankYouLOL"
6 months ago
Share →: When I was a kid I would say I’m whatever age and a half because I wanted to be older. Now I say I turned 40 a few years ago.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic childhood technique of adding that 'and a half' to sound more grown-up 🧒🏼. But as we reach the big 4-0, it's suddenly more about subtracting those years! 🎉😆 #ForeverYoung"