346 Funny say quotes

• This cop is parked illegally behind me with his lights on. I’m going to say something.

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  1 month ago

  confrontation, cop, going, humor, illegal, illegal parking, lights, me, parked, parking, police, sarcasm, say, something, traffic

• Every day, I go to work and draw a little tick on everyone who didn’t say goodbye to me the day before.

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  1 month ago

  before, daily, daily routine, day, draw, etiquette, every, everyone, exaggeration, goodbye, humor, i, interaction, joke, little, me, routine, sarcasm, say, social, social etiquette, social interaction, tick, work, workplace, workplace humor

• People who say “teamwork makes the dream work” are the reason that some people want to punch other people in the face.

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  1 month ago

  conflict, dream, dynamics, face, frustration, humor, office, office humor, people, punch, reason, sarcasm, say, social, social dynamics, teamwork, want, work, workplace

• I’m not exaggerating when I say, if I ever clogged a toilet at work, I would immediately quit, change my name, and then move to a different city.

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  1 month ago

  awkward, change, changing, changing name, city, different, ever, exaggeration, humor, i, move, moving, name, quit, quitting, say, toilet, work

• I will not accept a hint. I will act dumb until you say it clearly to me.

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  1 month ago

  accept, act, clarity, communication, dumb, humor, humor quote, i, irony, me, sarcasm, say, stubborn, stubborn act, stubbornness, wit

• They say we learn from our mistakes. That’s why I’m making as many as possible… I’ll be a genius soon.

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  1 month ago

  comedy, genius, humor, intelligence, learn, learning, making, mistake, mistakes, sarcasm, say, self-deprecating, soon, why, wit

• “I’m not falling for that again,” I say, as I’m about to fall for whatever that is again.

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  1 month ago

  again, comedy, fall, falling, humor, i, irony, procrastination, repetition, sarcasm, say, self-awareness, whatever

• Americans be like, “MM:DD:YY” is how you say dates verbally, and then have a national holiday called “4th of July.”

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  1 month ago

  4th, 4th of July, American, American culture, Americans, celebration, cultural, cultural difference, culture, date, date format, difference, format, holiday, humor, july, national, national holiday, pronunciation, say

• I never thought I would say this, and it took me a while to come to terms, but I think I ate too much bacon.

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  1 month ago

  bacon, food, health, humor, i, me, much, never, overeating, say, self-awareness, terms, think, thought, too, while

• If I say goodnight and an hour later you see me online, it’s not that I lied; it’s just that I failed.

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  1 month ago

  behavior, digital, digital behavior, excuse, failed, honesty, hour, humor, humor about truth, i, just, later, lying, me, online, procrastination, say, truth

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