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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

If I had just one hour left to live, I’d spend it in Math class… it never ends.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

My dream DUI is driving a Saab through the Great British Bake Off tent.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

My neighbor said he heard me having sex today but it was just me standing in front of my air conditioner.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

I just want everyone to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

I remember when asking someone if they were on X meant something completely different.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

I’m a strong, independent woman, but like, against my will.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Having a conversation with me is kind of like taking the scenic route.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

You can’t tell me there’s anything better than earplugs; I simply will not hear it.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

I’ve found that the easiest way to do burpees is to just not do burpees. No pain, no pain.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

Telling your parents about your problems is like trying to put out a fire with gasoline.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

4 hours ago

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

Dear sleep, I’m sorry we broke up this morning. I want you back!

Trending via WhatsApp:

My neighbor won’t stop talking about his Rolex and I can’t believe someone stole it tomorrow.

Spotted on Snapchat:

If you need time alone, just announce that you need help cleaning the cats litter box.

Seen just now on Discord:

You know you’re over 40 when you clean your house to the music you used to get drunk to.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

People who work in retail should be allowed to slap a customer or two each Christmas, as a little treat.

Making waves on WeChat:

I am a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

Going viral on Messenger:

Dogs come when they’re called; cats take a message and get back to you later.

Going viral on Twitch:

I’m accused of being a plagiarist. Their words, not mine.

Trending via WeChat:

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

Just landed via Slack:

I am dressing for the job I want. I want to be a sweatpants model.

Home » Funny Too Quotes

208 Funny too quotes

Funny too quotes are like the sprinkles on the cupcake of conversation, adding that extra pop of humor to your day. Whether you’re looking to lighten the mood at a meeting or just need a giggle during your coffee break, these little gems of wit have you covered. They’re the perfect way to say, “Hey, life’s too short to be serious all the time!” So, dive into the world of funny too quotes and let your chuckles echo through the digital halls of social media. Who knew wisdom could have such a good punchline?

New funny too quotes 👇

21 hours ago
Share →: When people suck the life out of you, they should take some fat too.

Commentary:
Trying to decide if I should charge a "fat tax" whenever someone drains my energy 😂🍕💪
2 days ago
Share →: Mothers will invent chores just to be mad you’re not doing them too.

Commentary:
When Mom's chore list is longer than a CVS receipt 📜😂🤦‍♂️
3 days ago
Share →: Frankly, I have too many situations and not enough monitors.

Commentary:
When juggling life's craziness, I need more screens than an action movie hacker! 📺🤯💻
4 days ago
Share →: Let’s drink some whiskey and say too much.

Commentary:
Ah yes, the perfect plan for discovering secrets or inventing new ones! 🥃😂🤐
5 days ago
Share →: Show me another rule so I can break that one too.

Commentary:
Another rule? Just call me the "Rule-ette"! 😜🚦💥
1 week ago
Share →: People who cook breakfast before going to work are too mature for me.

Commentary:
Ah, breakfast chefs in the morning are just overachievers with spatulas! 🥓👨‍🍳🍳
1 week ago
Share →: Imagine if we had to worry about dinosaurs too, on top of everything else.

Commentary:
Just what we need, a T-Rex trying to swipe right on our problems 🦖📱😂
1 week ago
Share →: I realized being an adult is just feeling too tired to function, and then functioning.

Commentary:
Adulting: when your spirit animal is a coffee cup and willpower is your superpower! ☕💪😴
1 week ago
Share →: What bootlickers fail to understand is that the boot eventually comes for them too.

Commentary:
Looks like they should start investing in steel-toed boots for extra protection 🤣🥾💥
1 week ago
Share →: Take me down to the Moria city, where the girls are green and the boys are stinky… and even Gandalf said ‘Nope, too freaky!’

Commentary:
Looks like even Gandalf couldn't handle the epic smell battles and orc-style fashion show! 🧙‍♂️💨😂

For even more funny too quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny too quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

4 hours ago

3,431

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

“I need a movie where the villain actually won!” Have you tried watching the news?

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

In my defense, Your Honor, I grossly misunderstood the meaning of Boxing Day.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

Scooby-Doo led me to believe that if I were ever really scared, I should run super-fast in place.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

It’s Monday again and I’m about to make it everyone’s problem.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

At the gym and I forgot my headphones and now I have to listen to my own thoughts. Send help.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

If someone asks you: ‘Why are you single, don’t you like people?’, answer: ‘Why aren’t you a millionaire, don’t you like money?’

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Relationship Status: just tried to pet my dog and he turned his head so I pretended I was reaching for a leaf that was next to him.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

I’ve just filed a restraining order against reality.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Not the sharpest cheddar on the charcuterie board.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

I think it’s time we acknowledged how incredibly stupid most super wealthy people are.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

I will always be hotter than everyone who hates me.

Going viral on WeChat:

Woke up feeling not too shabby for a 60-year-old. The only problem is I’m still in my 40s.

Trending via X:

Being offline for so long gave me the time to appreciate what’s really important in life, so I’m back online.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

There should be an Amazon driver at the Mall during the holidays so adults can sit on their lap and tell them what they want.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Y’all can keep the nonchalant ones — I want mine weak in the knees about me.

Breaking via Telegram:

Why do coffee beans smell so good, and coffee breath is like bleh?

Going viral on Messenger:

Are we all getting a front-row seat to the end times, or what?

Spotted on Twitch:

When my nudes go to the cloud, I always hope God is impressed.

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