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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Don’t wait for later to eat the cake. Do it now, before another mammal of your household finds it.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

Screw you guys, I’m gonna go make friends with the crows.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Note: Press the button on the elevator as often as possible to activate the secret express function and speed up the thing.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

Can’t. I’m busy taking this Buzzfeed quiz to find out what kind of potato I am.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

During arguments with idiots, I wish I could throw a flash bang and disappear.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

My mind is like my web browser. 19 tabs are open, 3 are frozen and I have no idea where the music is coming from.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Maybe the reason Miss Piggy is still single is she has a fear of kermitment.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Offering someone food, and secretly hoping, they don’t want it.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

The lion does not concern himself with the few small drops of pee that got on his boxers at the urinal even after he did a few shakes to be sure.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

I have feelings for you but you have to guess which ones.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2421 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,583

Funny Quotes Topics

15,254

Funny Quotes Images

12,583

52 minutes ago

3,450

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Prophecy class has been cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.

Going viral on WeChat:

Surround yourself with people who google the menu of the restaurant beforehand.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I get all the cardio I need by running out of patience.

Breaking via Twitch:

Humans are just chaos wrapped in meat, going bananas on caffeine.

Trending via YouTube:

Let’s lay on the couch together, play on our phones, and ignore each other, babe.

Just shared via Twitch:

Silicon Valley has taken over the world. Remember when nerds had the good manners to be ashamed of themselves?

Going viral on WeChat:

If I like cleaning? Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Just landed via Slack:

I slept like a baby, knowing I’m a burden to everyone around me.

Making waves on TikTok:

Do I work hard? No. But do I work smart to compensate. Absolutely not.

Home » Funny Want Quotes

441 Funny want quotes

Funny want quotes capture those moments when your desires are a little… over the top! 😆💭 Whether it’s wanting a lifetime supply of pizza, the perfect nap, or just one more day off, these quotes remind us that we all have *wants* — but some are definitely more hilarious than others. 🍕😴💸

New funny want quotes 👇

5 hours ago
Share →: I just want someone who can read a book with me in silence, and then do ungodly things sometimes.

Commentary:
Sounds like the perfect mix of a book club and a plot twist! 📚😈
19 hours ago
Share →: Worst part about job hunting is knowing you don’t want one.

Commentary:
Job hunting: the ultimate game of hide and seek where you're the seeker in denial 🤦‍♂️🔍💼
2 days ago
Share →: Crossing things off my to-do list… I didn’t do them, I just don’t want them on my list anymore.

Commentary:
Procrastination level: expert! 😂✏️🗑️
3 days ago
Share →: Having a job is crazy. When you’re at home, you feel lonely and want to go to work. When you’re at work, you’re exhausted and just want to go home.

Commentary:
Work-life balance is just a fancy way of saying I'm confused about where I want to nap! 🛋️💤💼
3 days ago
Share →: But what if I don’t want someone that’s good for me?

Commentary:
Hmm, sounds like someone's ideal partner is a bag of chips and a Netflix binge 🍟📺🤔
3 days ago
Share →: Babies will literally step on your face just to grab what they want.

Commentary:
When you're just an obstacle on their path to world domination 😂👶💪
4 days ago
Share →: Marriage is scary, what if he doesn’t want our house to look like my Pinterest board.

Commentary:
Just imagine he suggests a couch without 37 decorative pillows 🛋️😱📌
5 days ago
Share →: I’m sorry I said “Awooga” when you took off your clothes. Do you still want to have sexy time?

Commentary:
Awooga! Guess my inner cartoon character couldn't handle the wardrobe malfunction! 😂🚨
7 days ago
Share →: The problem with expensive things is that you tend to want them.

Commentary:
Budget be like: "I'm not a wish granter, I'm a reality slapper!" 💸😂
1 week ago
Share →: You’re 25, stressing like you’re 40, because you want to be rich before 30, am I right?

Commentary:
Sounds like we need a nap and a lottery ticket! 😂🛌💸

For even more funny want quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny want quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2421 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,583

Funny Quotes Topics

15,254

Funny Quotes Images

12,583

52 minutes ago

3,451

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

Took the road less travelled after buying the sat nav less expensive.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

My favorite delusion is that I just need to get through this week.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

Every man’s biggest fear is trying a new barber.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

Love those deep burps that instantly make me feel like I lost 10 lbs.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

Getting my next boyfriend a flip phone. He doesn’t need anything more.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

“I’ll worry about it next time.” Me pissing off future me.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

I would love to go back to the days when the biggest stress was finding the best hiding place when playing hide and seek.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Establish dominance at work by telling your coworkers they look tired before they get a chance to say it to you.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t change clothes.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Any place is a walkable city if you’re broke enough.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Reddit:

When you try to be humble and say it’s no big deal and they agree with you.

Just shared via YouTube:

Reading about two insects who fall in love in Italy. It’s a Rome ants novel.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

How bad can a decision really be if nobody from the future shows up to stop you?

Seen just now on Facebook:

What do you mean I overthink things (as I wonder if I hurt my dog’s feelings by liking cat videos on Instagram)?

Just landed via Pinterest:

Never make a promise you can’t keep rescheduling.

Just shared via TikTok:

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Spewing nonsense online is the most fun a depressed person is allowed to have in these twisted times.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

“I’m not even close to how crazy I’m legally entitled to be.”

Seen just now on Discord:

The difference between a hippo and a zippo is that one is really heavy and the other is a little lighter. Thank you and good night.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

“23 and Me” is how Leonardo DiCaprio RSVPs for events.

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