Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

I handed in my exam blank so that the teacher has more time to celebrate Christmas with her family.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Life sucks. One day you have tiramisu, and then most other days you don’t. I hate that.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

What we need is more companies making hot sauce. I need 900 more ways to taste a thing that tastes exactly like all the other ones.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

Even before the internet, I always had a little side chat going on in my head.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Vote for me and I will halve the calories in chocolate.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

My doctor told me to try a milk bath. Adding the Cinnamon Toast Crunch was my idea.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

My dogs don’t feel earthquakes because they have constant gas.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

People who don’t have a dishwasher, where do they bang their shins?

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

Too many losers and not enough people telling them they’re losers.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Checking Twitter now is like staring into your refrigerator to see if anything good has magically appeared.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

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17,766

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15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

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Social Media Log 💫

Live now on YouTube:

Not photogenic, but I probably look soooo good as a distant memory.

Trending via Instagram:

The only talent I have is spending more than I bring in.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I don’t give people directions. What if no one wants them there?

Shared recently on Facebook:

If you’re the type of person who likes to be left alone, I’m with you. Better yet, I’m not with you.

Just shared via Reddit:

Walking that line between “The internet is great” and “The internet is a mistake” daily.

Trending via Threads:

Today sucked so bad, I had to stop by the liquor store on my way to the bar.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

So sad. Elvis died before he could see the Lego movie. He woulda been like, ‘Mama, those blocks are movin’ and shakin.’

Shared recently on YouTube:

Every gift guide for men is like “A flannel flask to hold your knife flavored whiskey.”

Trending via Reddit:

Work from home ain’t for everyone. I, for one, hate when my coworkers try to message when I’m shopping.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all: I watched Rebel Moon 2 and the Netflix app worked well. Showed me the entire movie. In color.

93 Funny word quotes

More funny word quotes 👇

Our pronunciation of the word “colonel” does feel like group psychosis.

1 week ago

absurdity, colonel, feel, group, group psychosis, humor, language, linguistics, pronunciation, psychosis, word
Sorry for what I said when I was drunk. I meant every word.

1 week ago

apology, confession, context, drunk, every, honesty, humor, i, meant, relationship, sorry, word, words
They invented the word metallic, because irony was already taken.

1 week ago

humor, invention, irony, language, metallic, taken, wit, word, word invention
We need a word for that weird feeling you get when you learn what a podcaster looks like.

1 week ago

appearance, feeling, humor, learn, learning, looks, need, podcaster, reaction, surprise, weird, weird feeling, word
Why call it a “step dad” when you could have called it a faux pas?

1 week ago

call, dad, family, faux, faux pas, humor, jokes, parenting, pas, play, relationships, step, step dad, why, word, word play
I drive regularly so that my brain doesn’t forget swear words.

1 week ago

brain, drive, forget, humor, i, swear, swear word, word, words
The word “ugly” cannot be used on women, I’m sorry. Women just can’t be ugly, that’s a boy thing.

1 week ago

beauty, boy, gender, humor, just, perception, sorry, stereotype, thing, ugly, used, women, word
The word synergy sounds like a mix of the words sin and energy. Like, to be debauched but to do it with flair and zest.

2 weeks ago

creativity, debauchery, energy, flair, fun, humor, mix, sin, sounds, synergy, word, wordplay, words, zest
There’s a word in modern Hungarian slang, egérmozi, which describes watching films (or shows) on your phone. It means “mouse cinema”.

2 weeks ago

activity, cinema, culture, egérmozi, films, fun, fun activity, Hungarian, means, modern, modern culture, mouse, mouse cinema, phone, shows, slang, watching, watching films, word
As someone who was born in August, I find the word leotard extremely offensive.

2 weeks ago

August, birthday, born, humor, i, leotard, offensive, someone, word

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Social Media Stars ⭐

97 shares on WeChat this month:

Kendrick inspires me to be a bigger, deeper, more passionate hater.

95 shares on Discord this month:

I would love to be normal, but unfortunately, I was raised by the internet and a microwave.

17 shares on Discord this month:

Calling me ugly isn’t even an insult, because I know already.

12 shares on Reddit this month:

If I’m ever in a coma, please pluck my chin hairs.

48 shares on Pinterest this month:

Losing and then immediately gaining weight is my superpower.

62 shares on TikTok this month:

You know you’re getting older when you keep asking “Why do they have to make the instructions so small?”

21 shares on WeChat this month:

Let’s build a fort with blankets and pillows, and just stay in it all day.

88 shares on WeChat this month:

I have more trips planned than I have money.

90 shares on WeChat this month:

Even at my most powerful, I’m still a little sleepy.

41 shares on WeChat this month:

How am I supposed to make life choices when I still use my fingers to count and sing the whole alphabet to see what letter comes next.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

I know some people don’t like me, but what can I do, not everyone has good taste.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Can I come over and be your midnight snack?

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

I am stoned and laying in bed reading, and the idea of Santa going on Ozempic popped into my head, and I whispered, “No!”

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

Distance is my jam; solitude is my peanut butter.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Nosferatu 2024, Frankenstein 2025, and Werwulf 2026. I was born at exactly the right time.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

Drive like no one is watching.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

Male barista called me “my love” yesterday and didn’t say it today… getting mixed signals and feeling really upset.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

I may not have lost all my marbles yet, but there’s a small hole in the bag somewhere.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

It’s crazy that you don’t really argue with a baby for the first year of its life and then you have to argue with the baby every day.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

How am I supposed to relax when there are things?

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

As an academic, I sometimes dream about writing fiction instead, and then I remember grant proposals.

Activity Log ✨

93 Funny word quotes

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All funny word quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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