81 Funny alcohol quotes

• What does international law say about a third Margarita?

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  4 weeks ago

  alcohol, drink, humor, international, international law, law, margarita, question, say, third

• It’s funny how drinking 8 cups of water a day seems impossible, but 7 beers and 5 shots in two hours go down like a fat kid on a seesaw.

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  4 weeks ago

  5, 8, alcohol, beer, beers, comparison, day, drinking, drinking water, fat, Funny, funny comparison, hours, humor, impossible, impossible task, kid, seems, seesaw, shot, shots, task, water

• It’s crazy how drinking poison makes you feel like shit the next day.

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  4 weeks ago

  alcohol, crazy, day, drinking, feel, hangover, health, humor, irony, next, poison, shit

• Don’t blame the alcohol. You were an idiot before you started drinking.

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  4 weeks ago

  alcohol, before, blame, drinking, humor, idiot, started

• If alcohol was the one that was banned instead of weed, then a lot of people would have had memories of hungry, stoned fathers instead of angry, drunk ones.

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  4 weeks ago

  alcohol, anger, angry, ban, drunk, father, hunger, hungry, lot, memory, ones, people, stoned, weed

• The thing I can’t get over about Love Island is they’re only allowed 2 drinks a night, like they’re all just acting like that.

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  4 weeks ago

  2, acting, alcohol, allowed, drink, drinks, humor, i, island, just, limitation, love, Love Island, night, only, over, reality, reality show, sarcasm, show, thing

• Cocktails can be tricky, because they taste like juice, but then the next thing you know… you can’t walk.

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  4 weeks ago

  alcohol, cocktail, cocktails, drink, humor, juice, know, next, party, taste, thing, tipsy, tricky, walk, walking

• And then the vodka whispered, “Say what you really think.”

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  4 weeks ago

  alcohol, drinking, honesty, humor, say, think, vodka, whisper

• Beer is Narcan for when you overdose on Microsoft Teams.

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  4 weeks ago

  alcohol, beer, humor, meeting, microsoft, Microsoft Teams, Narcan, overdose, recovery, Teams, work

• Imagine a refund on all the money you spent on alcohol.

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  4 weeks ago

  alcohol, finance, humor, imagination, imagine, money, refund, spending, spent

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