37 Funny control quotes

• 

  1 week ago

  Share →: A real smart TV would increase the volume when you started eating chips.

  Commentary:
  "Finally, a TV that understands my midnight snack struggles! 🍿😋🔊"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: My husband is looking for the remote control. I need everyone to stand up for a minute.

  Commentary:
  "When finding the remote needs military precision. Everyone, prepare for 'Operation Sofa Search'! 🛋️🔍🤣"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Thinking about writing my own eulogy because I don’t want my loved ones to say I’m a control freak.

  Commentary:
  "At least you'll get the last word… and the last laugh! 😂✏️📝 #UltimateControl"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: “You look tired.” Yes, bro, I stayed up all night obsessing over things I have no control over.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the prestigious Insomniac Overthinker's Club has gained another member! 🎉😴🤔 #OverthinkingChampion"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Male birth control is free, and it’s called wearing Crocs with socks.

  Commentary:
  "When your footwear says 'I'm not a dad, but I play one on the weekends' 🤣🧦👞"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: Very disappointed to find out that the universal remote control I bought does not control the universe.

  Commentary:
  "Seems like the universal remote control is not so 'universal' after all! 🤷‍♂️🌌 Next time, aim for a model that comes with a galaxy-sized battery pack! 🔮😂"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Whenever I’m sad, you’re there. Whenever I have problems, you’re there. Whenever I lose control, you’re there. Let’s face it, you are bad luck.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'bad luck charm' relationship dynamic! 🌪️ But hey, at least they're always around, right? 🤷‍♂️ Who needs a four-leaf clover when you have such consistent 'luck' by your side? 🍀😂"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Please remember, I am an inspiration for birth control.

  Commentary:
  "Whenever I walk into a room, the urge to use birth control suddenly skyrockets! 🚫👶😆"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: My favorite yoga pose is reaching for the remote control on the far end of the table without falling off the couch.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the elusive 'Couch Potato' pose – a true test of flexibility and balance for those of us dedicated to the ancient art of TV watching 🧘‍♂️🛋️ Remember, it's all about finding inner peace… and the right channel!

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Spiraling out of control if anyone wants anything.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the classic case of spiral-manity! 🌀🤷‍♂️ When chaos reigns and requests fly left, right, and center, it's every man for himself! Just hold on tight, folks, and hope for the best amidst this whirlwind of demands! 🤯🎢 #LifeInASpiral

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