209 Funny daily quotes

• “What fresh hell is this?“ It’s actually the same hell as yesterday. Not fresh at all, really.

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  1 week ago

  actually, comedy, daily, daily grind, fresh, frustration, grind, hell, humor, irony, repetition, same, sarcasm, yesterday

• I should have peed before I left, and other things I’ll never learn: A memoir

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  1 week ago

  before, daily, daily life, embarrassment, humor, humorous, humorous reflection, i, learn, left, lesson, life, life lesson, memoir, never, procrastination, reflection, should, things

• The older I get, the more I understand why roosters just scream to start their day.

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  1 week ago

  aging, daily, daily routine, day, funny observation, humor, humor quote, i, just, morning, observation, older, rooster, routine, scream, start, understand, wake up, why

• Shall I cook, clean, or do the grocery shopping? Okay, reading it is.

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  1 week ago

  chores, clean, cook, daily, daily task, decision, decision making, grocery, humor, humor quote, i, laziness, making, okay, procrastination, reading, shopping, task

• I’m looking forward to tomorrow. It’ll be much like today, but different enough to confuse me.

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  1 week ago

  anticipation, confuse, confusion, daily, daily life, different, enough, forward, humor, irony, life, looking, me, much, routine, today, tomorrow

• So, you’re telling me I’m just supposed to get up every day and keep living like this? Seems like a scam to me.

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  1 week ago

  daily, daily life, day, every, existential, frustration, humor, humor quote, just, keep, life, life struggle, living, me, monotony, sarcasm, scam, seems, struggle, telling

• Rise and grind your teeth gently while ruminating over every past mistake.

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  1 week ago

  daily, daily grind, every, gently, grind, health, humor, humor quote, mental, mental health, mistake, motivation, over, past, perseverance, reflection, resilience, rise, self-awareness, self-improvement, teeth, while

• Every time I stand up, my dog gets excited as hell. He understands that I’m a real man who can make shit happen at any given moment.

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  1 week ago

  confidence, daily, daily life, dog, enthusiasm, every, excited, excitement, happen, hell, humor, i, life, man, masculinity, moment, motivation, pet, real, shit, stand, time

• Some days you feel like you’re surrounded by idiots, other days you realize it’s not just some days.

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  1 week ago

  daily, daily life, days, feel, frustration, humor, idiots, just, life, perspective, realize, relatability, sarcasm, self-awareness, surrounded

• Absent father sucks, but have you met the final boss, the father who is actually in your life every day but emotionally unavailable, lol.

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  1 week ago

  absent, absent father, actually, boss, daily, daily presence, day, distance, dynamics, emotional, emotional distance, emotional unavailability, emotionally, every, family, family dynamics, father, father figure, figure, final, humor, life, lol, met, parent-child, parent-child relationship, presence, relationship, sucks, unavailability, unavailable

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