Funny quotes English

Funny English quotes

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

12 hours ago

Little kid on the plane to Boston says “do they speak English there?” and his mom says “kinda!”

1 week ago

She left me because of my poor English. But I doesn’t care.

3 weeks ago

If you ever think English is not a weird language just remember that read and lead rhyme and read and lead rhyme. But read and lead don’t rhyme, and neither do read and lead.

2 months ago

In English we say: “You changed.” But in poetry we say: “You became a stranger wearing the face I used to love, and I am haunted by the ghost of who you were.”

2 months ago

Science has enough bodies, I’m donating mine to English lit just to spice things up a bit.

2 months ago

I always preferred the English spelling of “diarrhea” which is “diarrhoea” because it really looks like you’ve lost control of your vowels.

2 months ago

Really looking forward to the day my teenager starts speaking English again.

3 months ago

You know you’re getting old when you have to watch shows that are in English with subtitles.

3 months ago

I might not be able to speak another language but I can speak English slower!

3 months ago