Funny quotes financial

60 Funny financial quotes

My age no longer permits me to suffer for love, so if you see me sad, it’s due to lack of money.

1 week ago

Can’t believe we used to throw eggs at houses, and now we can afford neither eggs nor houses.

2 weeks ago

If you turn your phone upside down, the stock market is actually doing quite well.

2 weeks ago

Just did my own taxes, I should be in jail by Friday.

1 month ago

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

1 month ago

My wallet is empty, just like my soul.

1 month ago

The only exercise I’ve done this month is running… out of money!

1 month ago

I need money, not feelings.

1 month ago

Spending all my money on lottery tickets so I’ll either be rich or poor, none of this wishy-washy stuff in the middle.

1 month ago

I’m a credit card, cause I’m always being used or denied.

1 month ago

I have tasted employment, I have tasted joblessness and I recommend generational wealth guys.

1 month ago

No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

2 months ago

A college education is one of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get.

2 months ago

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesn’t pay any bills.

2 months ago

Due to financial reasons, I will now be performing photosynthesis.

3 months ago

I miss when bills were none of my business.

3 months ago

Me, one week before the new year: Not to brag, but I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of the year.

3 months ago

It’s normal that my retirement plan is 100% contingent on me finding buried treasure at some point, right?

3 months ago

For financial reasons, I will be passing away.

3 months ago

Jingle all the way? In this economy?

3 months ago