Commentary:
"Breaking News: Fact checkers discover the news was supposed to have facts all along! 🎤🐸📺"
Tag Archives: 1648 Funny just quotes
Just blocked all the ugly people, so if you see this… what’s up, big sexy?
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Looks like I'm in the VIP club of stunning! Who knew good looks granted internet access? 😎✨
Not to brag, but I just stood up without making a sound. Don’t be jealous.
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Wow, someone's clearly the ninja master of creaky joints! 🤫🦸♂️
Our parents just don’t know how far we rode them bikes when we were younger.
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Riding our bikes felt like an epic quest, and our parents were none the wiser! 🏞️😂🚴♂️
If I was on Love Island, I wouldn’t be fighting anyone or starting drama. I would just be playing mermaids in the pool the whole time. They’ve got that giant, beautiful pool, and nobody’s using it.
Commentary:
🌊🤿 "Forget the drama, I'm just here for synchronized swimming and mermaid auditions. Who's got the glitter tails?" 🧜✨
I got a bumper sticker that says, “Honk if you think I’m pretty.” Sometimes I just sit at green lights until I feel better about myself.
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Why wait for honks? Blast some music and strut your stuff, green light or not! 🚦💃🎶
Have nothing to say, I just wanted to appear in your newsfeed.
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Sliding into your newsfeed like a ninja with nothing but good vibes and a bad sense of direction 😂🤷♂️📩
Lois Lane said, “Clark?” like she didn’t just make out with that same jawline in spandex twelve hours ago.
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Clearly, Lois needs to schedule an eye exam. 🦸♂️👓💋
This morning, like every morning, he practiced his quick draw of his finger guns in the bathroom mirror, because you just never know.
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"Just in case of a high-noon showdown with the reflection sheriff! 🤠🔫😆"
A political guy who supports communism because he hates applying for jobs and just wants to be assigned somewhere.
Commentary:
Sounds like he's found the ultimate life hack for job hunting 😂📝🚀