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36 Funny listen quotes

Did you know that if you listen to any Black Sabbath album backwards, you can hear them singing backwards?

3 months ago

My wife screamed “you haven’t listened to a single word I’ve said, have you?!” I was taken aback, what a weird way to start a conversation.

3 months ago

If you listen to my husband snore, you don’t need Jurassic Park anymore.

3 months ago

I listen to a lot of white noise, so I get really excited when it rains or someone turns on a fan. It’s like seeing my favorite band live.

3 months ago

I can usually cope with the opinions of others because I don’t listen.

3 months ago

Me as the therapist: “Listen, just take a nap!”

3 months ago

In my 20’s: might hit the club tonight. In my 40’s: might go to the grocery store to listen to some bangers.

3 months ago

Relationship rule: If the woman has told something and the man doesn’t remember, the man hasn’t listened. If the man has told something and the woman doesn’t remember, the man has never told it.

3 months ago

I’m writing a parenting book called ‘Kids won’t listen until you scream like your mother did’.

3 months ago

My brain says “Let’s do something exciting today” but my body says “Don’t listen to that fool.”

3 months ago

I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.

3 months ago

You call it nagging, I call it ‘listen to what I said the first time!’

3 months ago

I am a full grown adult. Now listen to me discuss the various plot holes in Paw Patrol.

3 months ago

My neighbors listen to really good music, whether they like it or not.

3 months ago

Listen, before I had my coffee I didn’t know how awesome I was going to be today either.

3 months ago

Listen kid, I have social media profiles older than you.

3 months ago