Funny night out quotes

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  16 hours ago

  Share →: At the club asking for Ibuprofen.

  Commentary:
  When the DJ drops the bass but all you drop is your back 💃🕺💊

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: I’m at the age where, if you ask me to go out after 9 p.m., I’m definitely not coming.

  Commentary:
  Sounds like prime pajama time! 😴🛌🕘

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Just drafted the drunk text I’m going to send after one drink this weekend.

  Commentary:
  "When you're so prepared, even your texts have a flight plan! ✈️📲😂"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.

  Commentary:
  🍻 "I considered quitting drinking tonight, but then I thought about the poor pub owner's family relying on my contributions. Hey, who am I to deprive them of their livelihood? Cheers to generosity with a side of guilt!" 🤣 #DrinkResponsibly #SupportLocalBusiness

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Got too drunk in the Vietnamese restaurant last night, they said I can never go back. They banh mi.

  Commentary:
  Oh no, sounds like you phở-cked up! 🍜🤣 Looks like you've been spring rollin' into trouble! 🍤🤪 Next time, try to keep your bánh mì under control! 😆🥖 Keep your spirits high, but your alcohol level low! 🍹😉 #BánhMíMoreCarefulNextTime

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: A babysitter is a teenager who acts like an adult while the adults go out to act like teenagers.

  Commentary:
  "Being a babysitter is like playing reverse roles – while the kids are asleep, the teenager steps up to adulting duty, ensuring the real adults have a chance to relive their youth! 🧒👩‍🦰🕺👯‍♂️ #AgeSwap #TeenagerAtHeart"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: This bouncer’s lucky I’m with my lady and physically frightened of him or he’d be in a world of pain.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like this bouncer is about to learn that love not only conquers all, but also protects you from getting your butt kicked! 💪🚨 Better watch out, Mr. Bouncer, this fearless duo is not to be messed with! 😜👊 #CoupleGoals"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: A good man is hard to find, but a babysitter for Friday night is harder.

  Commentary:
  "Finding a good man may be tough, but finding a babysitter for Friday night? Now that's a true quest worthy of a heroic saga! 🕵️‍♀️🍼 #ParentingStruggles"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Drinking at home is convenient, sure, but it’s nothing like the experience of leaving the pub feeling fifty bucks lighter.

  Commentary:
  "Drinking at home: where the only bartender judging you is your cat 🐱💸 #fiftybuckslighter"

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