Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Getting married soon. Just need a spouse.

Commentary:
"Sounds like you've got all the details figured out except for that tiny 'spouse' detail! 🤷‍♂️ May your search for the missing puzzle piece be as exciting as planning the wedding itself! 💍🕵️"
6 months ago
Share →: My swear jar is filing for an IPO soon.

Commentary:
Looks like someone's profanity levels are reaching a market high! 🤑🤬 Time to invest in some self-censorship stocks before your swear jar becomes Wall Street's next big IPO sensation! 💰📈 #ProfanityProfits
6 months ago
Share →: The days will soon be shorter again. Then it won’t rain for so long.

Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal optimist finding the silver lining in shorter days! 🌧️ Let's hope for brighter skies and shorter rainy spells ahead! ☀️☔️"
6 months ago
Share →: Any cults got something wild planned anytime soon? I’m trying to find the good estate sales.

Commentary:
"Looking for some killer deals, huh? Better watch out for those cults, they might have some 'killer' estate sales planned! 👀💰 Just make sure you don't accidentally sign up for their next pyramid scheme… or pyramid tomb? 🏛️😂 #EstateSaleGoals"
6 months ago
Share →: Duolingo should have an “I’m going on holiday to this place very soon” setting so it teaches you “can I have the bill” and so on instead of “the cow boils an egg”.

Commentary:
"Duolingo, turning 'the cow boils an egg' into 'can I have the bill' one confused traveler at a time 🐄🥚➡️📝 #LostInTranslation #TravelTuesdays"
6 months ago
Share →: Don’t worry. There is still hope for the summer: the rain should get warmer soon.

Commentary:
"Don't fret about a soggy start to summer! Just think of it as a free 'rain sauna' service. 🌧️☀️ Who needs a beach when you've got a warm raincoat? Keep those spirits up, and remember, soggy weather builds character and strong umbrella-wielding skills!"
6 months ago
Share →: I hate small cars that disguise themselves as free parking spaces and drop their masks as soon as you pull up in front of them.

Commentary:
Oh, those sneaky small cars playing hide-and-seek with parking spots! 🚗🤔 Don't be fooled by their innocent size, they're just waiting to reveal their true form the moment you approach. It's like a magician's trick gone wrong in the world of parking! 🎩✨ #ParkingProblems
6 months ago
Share →: Anyone else who tells their pets every time they leave the house that they’ll be back soon?

Commentary:
"Admit it, we all turn into professional negotiators when saying goodbye to our pets – promising a quick return as if we're striking a crucial trade deal with them 🐶🐱 Who can resist those pleading eyes and wagging tails, after all? It's a sacred ritual of leaving the house – the 'I'll be back soon' declaration to our fur babies, complete with guilt-inducing puppy-dog stares and purrs of disapproval. It's an emotional rollerco