228 Funny things quotes

Funny things quotes are all about those little moments that make life unexpectedly hilarious! 😄💫 Whether it’s random objects that turn into the ultimate distractions, or the things that never seem to go where you left them, these quotes remind us that sometimes the smallest things bring the biggest laughs. Life is full of surprises, and most of them are pretty funny! 😂🎁🌀

I don’t know much, but I know this: the older you get…

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Getting older is basically a quest to avoid all lines. Next stop: teleportation! 🚶‍♂️➡️🏠✨

The feminine urge to say “ouch” when I bump into things tha…

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Ouch, I just bruised my dignity! 🤦‍♀️😆

Sorry, I can’t tonight. I’m busy taking things…

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Looks like I'm booked for an evening of overthinking and imaginary arguments! 🤔😂🗓️

My résumé is really just a list of things I hope I never ha…

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Looks like my résumé doubles as a list of past traumas I somehow survived! 😂📜✌️

“Life is a marathon, not a sprint.” Cool, I dis…

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Sounds like a life of couch marathons and snack sprints is more my style! 🛋️😂🍕

Good things take time, that’s why I’m always la…

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Always late but worth the wait! 😅⏰🎉

Everyone wants a goth girlfriend until she starts doing got…

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When she decorates your room like a vampire's crypt, suddenly you're no longer Team Edward 🧛‍♂️🖤😂

How am I supposed to relax when there are things?

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I can totally relate—every time I try to chill, my to-do list smirks at me and says, "Good one!" 😅📝

I don’t understand people who do things on weekends.…

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Weekends should come with a "Do Not Disturb" sign for humans 🛑😴 #ThingFreeZone

We need a word for a type of person who spends all their ti…

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Sounds like they're in a committed relationship with their couch—Netflix and chill are their favorite landmark! 🛋️📺🥤