13 Funny violence quotes

• When I tell you “I’m open to feedback” I’m telling you to be nice to me or I’ll resort to violence.

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  3 hours ago

  communication, expectations, feedback, honesty, humor, i, me, nice, open, sarcasm, self-defense, tell, violence

• If you sit down to play a game of chess and your opponent punches you in the face, you’re not going to prevail by getting better at chess.

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  8 hours ago

  better, chess, conflict, face, game, getting, going, humor, opponent, play, response, sit, strategy, unexpected, unexpected response, violence

• Due to the humidity, my hair has chosen violence.

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  1 day ago

  bad, bad hair day, day, due, frustration, hair, humidity, humor, violence, weather

• Maybe the reason we weren’t that affected by all the violence we saw in cartoons as kids is because it was offset by classical music.

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  1 day ago

  cartoon, cartoons, childhood, classical, classical music, contrast, humor, kid, kids, maybe, music, nostalgia, reason, saw, violence

• There are approximately 1,010,300 words in the English language, but I could never string enough words together to properly express how much I want to hit you with a chair.

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  2 months ago

  chair, count, English, English language, enough, express, expression, frustration, hit, humor, i, insult, language, much, never, properly, sarcasm, string, together, violence, want, word, word count, words

• Drinking coffee because hitting people over the head with a shovel is frowned upon.

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  2 months ago

  aggression, coffee, drinking, frowned, frustration, head, hitting, humor, over, people, sarcasm, shovel, upon, violence

• Violence is not the answer, unless you’re a gaggle of children instructed to break into a piñata.

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  2 months ago

  activity, answer, break, carnival, children, fun, fun activity, gaggle, humor, party, piñata, playful, violence

• I don’t like violence, but I don’t mind if I get hit by luck.

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  2 months ago

  chance, conflict, humor, irony, luck, mind, violence

• It is only when a mosquito lands on your testicles that you realize there is always a way to solve problems without using violence.

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  2 months ago

  always, humor, irony, lesson, life, life lesson, mosquito, only, perspective, problem, problem-solving, problems, realize, solve, solving, testicle, violence

• It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.

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  2 months ago

  bad, Bob, Bob Ross, boss, character, choice, fictional, fictional character, humor, irony, mob, mob boss, never, nice, ring, ross, too, violence, wake, wake up, woke

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