Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Even when I look up the slang of today’s kids, I still have no idea what it means.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

I like to people-watch, but I’m an advanced people-watcher. When I spot another people-watcher, I like to watch them watching other people.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

If I ever look at my phone in the middle of a conversation with you, I’m not reading a text; I’m just looking up the definition of a word I just used a bit too confidently.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re saying, “What kind of trees are those?”

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

Maybe the problem is that I’m cooler than any man I’ve ever met.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

It’s so hot outside that when I opened my front door I thought I was checking on my oven.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

“I’m not afraid to admit when I’m wrong. For example, I thought it was a good idea to leave the house today, which, as it turns out, was a terrible mistake.”

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

An introvert walked into a bar. Just kidding. The introvert stayed home.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

I’d like to thank the municipal snow plow for recreating the wall from Game of Thrones at the end of my driveway.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

I don’t do anything with my life except romanticize and decay with indecision.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

508 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,101

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,101

Updated

Dec 23, 2025

Users Online

3,688

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Is it just me or does everything cost like we’re shopping in an airport now?

Making waves on WhatsApp:

My phone and it’s charger are in a situationship and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

You can tell it’s desperate times the way spam messages have gone from fantasies like ‘I am a prince and I want to give you money’ to ‘I am an HR manager and I have a real job for you!’

Spotted on X:

I hope my email finds you enraged.

Going viral on Reddit:

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness, clearly never paid for a divorce.

Just landed via WeChat:

I’m really hoping money falls from the sky this week, or else I’m doomed.

Just shared via Messenger:

I enjoy excess, but only in moderation.

Seen just now on Threads:

Thought I was a minimalist, turns out I’m just broke.

Making waves on YouTube:

My ex is somewhere telling his new girlfriend how bad I was, and she’s smiling, thinking she made it in life. Two idiots.

Trending via TikTok:

If you ever see me out in public, just know I don’t want to be there.

More funny quotes 👇

Hey, people, my age. Remember going into the computer lab at school?

0

5 months ago

age, childhood, computer, computer lab, going, humor, lab, memory, nostalgia, people, remember, school, technology
Unpopular activity: minding your own business.

0

5 months ago

activity, behavior, business, humor, minding, minding business, own, personal, personal space, sarcasm, social, social behavior, space, unpopular, unpopular activity
Guy in front of me at the movies was reading the popcorn Wikipedia page while he was eating popcorn.

0

5 months ago

eating, entertainment, front, guy, humor, me, movie, observation, page, popcorn, reading, snack, while, Wikipedia
“Work smarter, not harder.” Brother, I’m not doing either of those things.

0

5 months ago

brother, doing, harder, humor, laziness, motivation, procrastination, productivity, smarter, things, work
My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and I’m like, cool, can one of you reach the top shelf for me.

0

5 months ago

boy, boys, cool, humor, joke, me, milkshake, reach, shelf, top, top shelf, yard
I have high standards for dating because I’m a high-quality woman, and you wouldn’t want me any other way.

0

5 months ago

confidence, dating, high, high-quality, humor, i, me, relationship, standard, standards, want, woman
Celebrities should not be allowed to name children.

0

5 months ago

allowed, celebrity, child, child name, children, culture, humor, name, naming, parenting, pop, pop culture, should
All the world’s a stage, and I always forget my line.

0

5 months ago

acting, always, forget, humor, i, line, performance, stage, world
Work beers should be a daily thing.

0

5 months ago

beer, beers, culture, daily, daily routine, humor, office, office culture, relaxation, routine, should, socializing, thing, work
The people that sing their heart out, but terribly, are my people.

0

5 months ago

bad, bad singer, community, heart, humor, music, passion, people, self-expression, sing, singer, singing

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

97 shares on Telegram this month:

I love being outside, just not when it’s too cold or too hot or too wet or too windy or if there are bugs.

87 shares on Threads this month:

Adults are always asking children what they want to be when they grow up because they’re looking for ideas.

10 shares on Slack this month:

I used to think I was indecisive, but I’m not so sure anymore.

15 shares on Twitch this month:

I think you’re like the cat’s meow, annoying yet sweet.

26 shares on Discord this month:

My showers take so long because I always hold a shower concert.

22 shares on Threads this month:

What is that job called where you put the little stickers on fruit? I think I would be good at that.

89 shares on Snapchat this month:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me I’m gonna say “I’m a biter” and see how it goes.

35 shares on Twitch this month:

I hate people that talk to their Apple watch. Fake Power Rangers.

16 shares on WeChat this month:

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.

30 shares on Slack this month:

Most puns make me feel numb, but math puns make me feel number.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

Ever read a post multiple times, still tilt your head and whisper, “What?!”

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

When you bury a body, cover it with endangered plants, so it’s illegal to dig it up. Follow me for more gardening tips!

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

What if aliens watch our movies about aliens and then invade accordingly in hopes of fitting in with our culture?

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

There is no sex. I lied. You are gonna lay here and take personality quizzes with me.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Someone asked me if I had plans for the fall. It took me a moment to realize they meant “Autumn,” not the collapse of civilization.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

Imagine sex with me. No, not like that, you’re doing it all wrong!

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

Why isn’t there a mosquito that sucks fat?

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Dance like China isn’t watching.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

Nice tweets, bro. What medications are you on?

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Adulting looked way more affordable in the 90’s. I feel scammed.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Pinterest:

In a parallel universe, Mariah Carey is doing her shopping and is sick of hearing me on every store’s speaker system.

Breaking via TikTok:

The real body count is how many people are in therapy because of you.

Just shared via Telegram:

But that was my emotional support daylight.

Spotted on X:

Watermelon. The fruit that comes with a workout.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Me: I’ve always wanted to stare at someone from across the street then disappear when a bus passes. Interviewer: I meant more like “professional goals”.

Going viral on Messenger:

Are we all getting a front-row seat to the end times, or what?

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I’m not sure my body can handle much more of this “getting out of bed” nonsense.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Calling ahead to the cafe to warn them to “get those beans brewing”.

Seen just now on TikTok:

May your coffee kick in, before reality does.

Spotted on TikTok:

If you don’t fall in love with me, I’ll write poetry about you and then you’ll regret it.

Activity Log ✨

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨