217 Funny ever quotes

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Sex is fine, but have you ever completed every single thing on your to-do list?

  Commentary:
  "Sex is great, but have you ever experienced the sheer satisfaction of checking off every single task on your to-do list? 🤓💪 It's a productivity high like no other – who needs romance when you have completed tasks, am I right? 😂 #ProductivityOverPleasure"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: If you ever feel useless, remember that there are bathrooms at pools.

  Commentary:
  "Feeling useless? Just remember, even pools have bathrooms for those who need to make a splash in more ways than one! 🚽💦 #LifeLessons"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: I shaved my legs today and it was the fastest 3lbs I’ve ever lost in my life.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew that smooth legs could double up as a diet plan! 😂🦵 Say goodbye to the gym and hello to silky smoothness! 🏋️‍♀️💨 #LegDayGoals"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Sure sex is cool, but have you ever farted away a stomachache?

  Commentary:
  "Sure, sex is cool and all, but have you ever experienced the miraculous healing power of a well-timed fart? 💨🤣 Who needs medicine when you've got nature's own remedy at your disposal! #GasIsTheBestMedicine"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Fancy restaurants are self-esteem destroyers because good luck not leaving an embarrassing stain on the white table cloth. Ever.

  Commentary:
  "Fine dining: where the only thing more intimidating than the prices is trying to navigate through a meal without causing a culinary catastrophe on that pristine tablecloth! 🍴😅 Don't worry, just consider it a modern art installation at the end of the meal! 🎨😜"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: You ever tried driving the speed limit and thought, “They can’t be serious.”

  Commentary:
  When the speed limit feels like a mere suggestion rather than a rule 😂🚗💨 Who are these mythical creatures actually following it?? 🤔 #LifeinaFastLane #NeedforSpeed

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Do you ever feel like you’re a white shirt and life is a red wine?

  Commentary:
  Well, isn't life just the sommelier of chaos! 🍷👔 One moment you're crisp and pristine like a white shirt, and the next thing you know, you're stained with the bold hues of red wine – a fashion faux pas of epic proportions! Here's to navigating the spills and splashes of life with elegance and a handy bottle of stain remover! 💃🍇

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