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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Tai Chi is so crazy because it’s like throwing a slow motion tantrum.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

Netflix be like “we know exactly what movie you talkin’ ’bout but we ain’t got it lol”.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

I wanted to study psychology, but I have more potential as a patient, to be honest.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

While the optimist and pessimist argued about the glass of water, the opportunist drank it.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Dating is the process of meeting someone until you find out what’s wrong with them.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

When they make a Hate Island, somebody link me.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

Some women seated next to me are gossiping in French. They obviously think I’m some dumb American who doesn’t speak French and they are correct.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

You should be able to wash your hair and it stays washed. What do you mean I have to do it again?

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Whoever coined the term coined the term coined the term coined the term.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but my doctor says I have an irreversible terminal condition called aging.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,267

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

There’s a reason you ain’t ever used your phone in a dream.

Going viral on Instagram:

Forever grateful that thought bubbles aren’t a real thing.

Just landed via TikTok:

Tinder, but for nearby people that have a printer you can use.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

People ask you, “are you crazy”, and then get scared when you answer, “yes”.

Breaking via Snapchat:

There’s someone in our team who behaves horribly to me and whenever I have to type his name, I’ve taken to using a slightly smaller font size than for everyone else’s.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I wasn’t feeling well so I googled my symptoms. I either have allergies or I died two days ago.

Going viral on X:

I’m so old, I used to cry as a child because I fell off my skateboard or bike, not because I didn’t have wifi.

Seen just now on Telegram:

It always takes me an hour to get ready. 45 minutes for doing nothing and 15 hectic minutes for the rest.

Spotted on Facebook:

Hey, man, we’re worshiping a false god later. If you wanna pull up.

Spotted on Twitch:

Working on a laptop outside is an abysmal experience.

Funny friendly quotes

Funny friendly quotes are the perfect way to brighten your day and share some laughs with your favorite people 😄✨ Whether you’re texting a buddy or posting online, these witty gems bring smiles, good vibes, and a splash of humor to every friendship 💬🤗 Get ready to spread joy and keep the fun rolling with clever lines that celebrate the lighter side of friendship! 🎉😂

New funny friendly quotes 👇

All funny friendly quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

99 shares on Snapchat this month:

I feel like everyone who has ever had a hamster has some kind of traumatic experience with it.

70 shares on X this month:

All the best memories with my dad start with “Don’t tell your mom about this.”

65 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Sorry, I can’t come over tonight. I’ve become too invested in these fictional characters and whether or not they will kiss.

72 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Maybe I died of Covid in 2020, and this is hell.

82 shares on Discord this month:

Apparently it’s inappropriate to yell out “Shots, shots, shots, shots” while your child’s getting immunizations at the pediatrician’s office.

61 shares on Pinterest this month:

Oh right, like you’ve never let your kids stay lost in a corn maze just a little longer.

42 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Y’all scared to be single, I’m scared to be in another pointless relationship.

32 shares on Threads this month:

King Kong should’ve been able to find a better place to hide than the top of the tallest building in the middle of New York City.

41 shares on Threads this month:

I’m convinced that if Earth explodes, all the cats will land safely on the moon, on their feet.

90 shares on Discord this month:

Have kids so you can live in a house full of people who can’t find anything.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

But have you tried getting slow neck kisses and soft ear whispers about it?

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If we were both crows, I’d bring you shiny things.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s nothing better than knowing that you don’t have to set an alarm clock for the next day.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Urgh. Trying to buy a copy of Catch-22 online but the seller won’t post it until I’ve paid and I won’t pay until I’ve received it.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Whether you rip off a bandaid quickly or slowly, I find it’s best to ask the wearer’s permission first.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’m asking Santa to bring some of you a sense of humor for Christmas.”

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Guy smoking weed daily: “I think smoking weed in moderation is fine.”

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Stranger: Your children are angels. Me: So was the devil.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

90% of parenting is just thinking about when you can lie down again.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Does my career know that I’m pursuing it, or is it another one-sided relationship?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,683

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

I wonder how much time The Weeknd saves not typing that extra e.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Keep your temper. Nobody else wants it.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

“I’m giving my daughter a male name, ain’t nobody cracking an Abdul.”

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

If she reads Bukowski, she’s not looking for love. She’s looking for someone who will ruin her creatively.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

It’s scary when an attractive person is attracted to you, omg.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

And for my next trick, I will turn yesterday’s sweatpants into today’s sweatpants.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

In my culture, family is completely unimportant. And we hate food.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

I’m not procrastinating. I’m protecting my peace through active avoidance.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

Damn, all this overthinking and I still be making dumb decisions.

Just shared via Instagram:

I’ve been blocked by better.

Going viral on Twitch:

Reading Shakespeare for the first time is crazy because you go, “Oh, that’s where that comes from,” every other page.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Bisexual just means that I wear perfume with my men’s deodorant.

Trending via X:

Actors in black and white movies were often putting their lives in danger during driving scenes, as they weren’t able to tell if the traffic light was red or green.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Oops, I think I’ve had a little too much to think.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Caught my son chewing on electrical wires. So, I grounded him. He’s doing better currently and conducting himself properly.

Going viral on Slack:

I got Botox, and I asked the doctor, “How many years younger will this make me look?” and he was like, “Zero. You’ll just look like the other girls your age who have also gotten Botox.”

Just shared via Reddit:

We got our carpet cleaned today, so I’m just waiting for the dog to throw up.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Canceled a date for a date with another guy, and that guy canceled. It’s what I deserve.

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