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1315 Funny me quotes

More funny me quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: Treat me like a joke and I’ll leave you like it’s funny.

Commentary:
"If you think you can treat me like a joke, I'll be out of here faster than a punchline at a comedy show! 🎭😂 #NotJustForLaughs"
5 months ago
Share →: Spotify has got it all wrong, the hottest single of the year is me.

Commentary:
Well, move over Spotify! 🎵🔥 Looks like the real chart-topper has arrived and it's not available for streaming! 😂💁‍♂️ Who needs a playlist when you're the ultimate hit single? 🌟 #TrendingOnMyOwnTerms
5 months ago
Share →: I don’t want to adult today, I just want to dog. I’ll be lying down on the floor in the sun, you can pet me and bring me some snacks.

Commentary:
"Who needs adulting when you can just be a carefree pup soaking up the sun and receiving snacks on demand? 🐶☀️ Don't worry, I'll bring the snacks as long as you promise belly rubs in return! #DogLifeGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

Commentary:
"Trying to change the world without the source code is like trying to cook without a recipe – disastrous! 🌎💻 #DeveloperDilemma"
5 months ago
Share →: I’m not lazy, I’m waiting for inspiration to hit me… should be here any time now.

Commentary:
"Just call me a dedicated professional – waiting patiently for the inspiration bus to arrive 🚌💡 Or maybe I'll just take a nap and hope it shows up in my dream instead! 😴✨"
5 months ago
Share →: I drink so much coffee, people feel jittery when they see a picture of me.

Commentary:
☕️ "I consume so much coffee, my mere presence is like a caffeine overload! Sorry for the jitters, folks – blame it on the beans!" 😄 #CoffeeFiend #CaffeineCraze
5 months ago
Share →: Once my school teacher lectured me for unacceptable behavior. That’s 30 mins of sleep I am never getting back

Commentary:
Looks like you had a lesson in 'sleepconomics'! 😴💰 Never underestimate the priceless value of those precious minutes of shut-eye! Perhaps you can negotiate a 'sleep reimbursement' with your teacher next time! 😉📚 #SleepDebt #TeacherTales
5 months ago
Share →: I didn’t like my beard at first… then it grew on me.

Commentary:
"Who knew facial hair could be so persuasive? 😉🧔 Embrace the beard life, it might just tickle your fancy! #BeardGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: Me, gently telling my kids that I ate the rest of the ice cream: Your dad ate the rest of the ice cream.

Commentary:
"Blame it on the dad and run 🏃‍♂️🍦! Classic move, parents 😆 #IceCreamGate"
5 months ago
Share →: If you like water, you already like 72% of me.

Commentary:
Well, well, well, who knew water could be so smooth with the pick-up lines! 🌊💦 Looks like this person is making a splash with their flirting game – who could resist someone with such a refreshing sense of humor? 😉 #DiveIntoLove