133 Funny myself quotes

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  6 months ago

  Share →: The question I ask myself most often is, “What would a jury think about this?”

  Commentary:
  Ah, the eternal pondering of a mind constantly questioning its own actions! 🤔🕵️‍♂️ It's like having a personal jury living rent-free in your brain, passing judgment on every decision from what to have for breakfast to how to style your socks. Just imagine the jury members in there furiously scribbling notes while you debate the important issues like laundry day or nap time. 🧦💭 Remember, in the courtroom of self, always aim

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  6 months ago

  Share →: I don’t weigh myself because most scales don’t know how heavy all the grudges I’m holding onto are.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a scale when your grudges are doing all the heavy lifting? 💪🏼😅 Remember, emotional baggage weighs more than any dumb old scale can measure! 🛍️"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: “You tryna hang?” Yeah bro, myself!

  Commentary:
  "Oh, just chilling with the best company ever – myself! Can't disappoint me, can't annoy me, can't steal my fries… Winning at life! 🕺🏼🤣 #JustMeMyselfAndI"

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