Funny quotes request

34 Funny request quotes

A coffee the size of Manhattan please.

4 days ago

Money doesn’t impress me. Giving it to me does.

1 month ago

I hate when people stare at me and don’t say anything. I mean, if you want an autograph or a picture just ask.

1 month ago

Can we start the weekend again? I wasn’t ready.

1 month ago

If you wish me a happy Thanksgiving, don’t be surprised if I whip out a ziplock bag and ask you to bring me home some leftovers.

1 month ago

Boyfriend hasn’t accepted my LinkedIn request yet. He doesn’t want to connect. He doesn’t want to build.

2 months ago

I don’t want to end this year on bad terms with anybody. Could you please apologize to me?

2 months ago

You have one week to ask me to be your Valentine. Requests must be in the form of poetic verse written in your blood.

2 months ago

Lord, please take this gas out of my stomach and put it in my car.

3 months ago

If I’m ever in a coma, please put chapstick on my lips.

3 months ago

Dearest, I beg of you, sleep properly and go for walks.

3 months ago

Can someone please fix the algorithm of my life?

3 months ago

Dear Aliens, Now would be a good time. Thanks!

3 months ago

Dear Santa, Money!

3 months ago

For my birthday, I want everyone to tell me how much they love me and why in immense detail.

3 months ago

Need someone to feed me Doritos while I read, so I don’t mess up the pages. No weirdos.

3 months ago

Could someone please come over here and be the adult? I’m too tired.

3 months ago

Going down a rabbit hole if anyone wants anything.

3 months ago

Me at war: You guys mind if I leave a bit early today?

3 months ago

Having an exorcism, but only because the demon requested it.

3 months ago