162 Funny still quotes

Trending Funny Still Quotes 🔥

Women who don’t check a man’s phone will still use their intuition and dreams to find out if he’s cheating.
If my wife and I got divorced and moved to separate states, I’m convinced I would still hear her chewing.
Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.
Hate it when my alarm goes off in the morning, and I’m still alive.
Best friends: they know how crazy you are but still choose to be seen in public with you.

More funny still quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: I just heard someone refer to Texas as “Howdy Arabia” and I still haven’t stopped laughing.

Commentary:
"Yeehaw Arabia! 🤠🌵 Who knew the Lone Star State had such a sweet new nickname? Wonder if they ride camels instead of horses out there! 🐫😄 #TexasTeaTime"
5 months ago
Share →: I once broke up with a guy because he ate half my french fries, and when I get really lonely, I still think about those french fries.

Commentary:
"French fries: the unsung hero of relationships. 🍟💔 Next time, make sure to swipe right for someone who respects your fried potato boundaries! #frenchfrylove"
5 months ago
Share →: Rich people don’t put their couches against their wall. I moved my couch into the middle of the floor and still haven’t gotten rich. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong here.

Commentary:
"Maybe the secret to becoming rich lies not in moving your couch, but in moving your money 🛋️💸 Who knew financial success didn't come with free furniture rearrangement tips? 🤔😂 #CouchConfusion"
5 months ago
Share →: I’m getting close to that age where people applaud the things I’m “still able to do”.

Commentary:
"Reaching that age when simply getting out of bed deserves a round of applause! 👏🕺 Age is just a number, but those applause sure feel real! 😄🎉"
5 months ago
Share →: Soup is great for when you’re hungry but want to still feel hungry afterward.

Commentary:
"Oh, the magical charm of soup – fulfilling your hunger while leaving you yearning for more 🍲😋 It's like a delicious tease for your taste buds, always keeping you hungry for that next delightful spoonful!"
5 months ago
Share →: I can relate to God because it also takes me a full week to finish something that still kind of sucks.

Commentary:
"I can totally relate to God too – we both have our struggles when it comes to perfecting our creations! 😂💫 #CreatorProblems"
5 months ago
Share →: I haven’t given up on my fairy-tale ending. I still plan to be eaten by a wolf.

Commentary:
"Embracing the unconventional happily-ever-afters, our dreamer sets the bar high by aiming to star in a twisted fairy tale where the wolf plays the leading role 🐺. Talk about taking a bite out of life! 🌟📚 #FairyTaleGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: Thanks to rice cakes, I still can’t imagine nothingness, but now I know what it tastes like.

Commentary:
"Rice cakes: the snack that makes you question existence 🤔 Who knew something with 'nothingness' in the description could be so crunchy and bland? 😂 #RiceCakeEpiphanies"
5 months ago
Share →: Good morning to everyone except myself cause I wish I was still asleep.

Commentary:
"Good morning to all the early birds out there, flying high while the rest of us dream about hitting the snooze button for the 100th time! 😴🐦 Rise and shine…or just rise and hope for more coffee ☕️ #SleepyHead"
5 months ago
Share →: Foo fighters still fighting foo.

Commentary:
Looks like those foo fighters have got some serious dedication! 💪🎸 Maybe one day they'll finally conquer the mighty foo for good! 🤣 #NeverEndingBattle