211 Funny thing quotes

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  1 month ago

  Share →: It’s a good thing Titanic is only a movie. A lot of people would’ve died.

  Commentary:
  "Good point! 😅 Otherwise, iceberg lettuce would have a whole new meaning❄️🥗 #HistoryWithPlotTwists"

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  1 month ago

  Share →: Posing for photos has to be the most basic thing I’m actually terrible at.

  Commentary:
  "Me too! My best angle is usually a blur! 😂📸 #ProfessionalPhotoPhantom"

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  1 month ago

  Share →: Why do birds love going apeshit first thing in the morning?

  Commentary:
  "Because even birds know it's never too early for a wild party! 🎉🐦🍎"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: While you were rotting and wasting your life away, I was doing the exact same thing.

  Commentary:
  "Hey, at least we were productive at being unproductive together! 🤷‍♂️😂🍕"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: The one thing I’ve never had in my car’s glove box is a pair of gloves.

  Commentary:
  Looks like your glove box is playing hard to get! 🤣🧤 Maybe it's just practicing for the "hand" of friendship — or maybe it's secretly a minimalist with a sense of humor! 🚗😂

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  2 months ago

  Share →: I’m officially at the age where my favorite thing to do is sit down.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like I've officially unlocked the 'Sitting Down Enthusiast' level in life 🪑😂 Who knew that retirement age would come knocking so soon? Just call me the reigning champion of the seated Olympics! 💺🥇"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: The hottest thing a man can be is boring in his 30s.

  Commentary:
  Well, well, looks like bland is the new bold in the world of 30-something men 🕶️😄 Who knew that monotony could be so scorching hot? 🔥Guess the key to sizzling charisma lies in being as exciting as watching paint dry 😂💼 #DullIsTheNewSexy

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  2 months ago

  Share →: Due to inflation and tariffs, my love now costs a thing.

  Commentary:
  Looks like love is no longer priceless, it now comes with a hefty price tag! 💸💔 Better start saving up or find yourself a love bargain during the next sale season! 😉 #LoveIsExpensiveNow

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: The human body requires so much maintenance. Who designed this thing?

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the marvels of the human body – a complex machine that comes with no instruction manual and requires constant TLC! 🤔💪 Just imagine the designer going, 'Let's include random sneezing and a brain that craves both salad and ice cream – that'll keep things interesting!' 😂 #JustHumanThings"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: You want me to do Pilates? The thing that killed Jesus?

  Commentary:
  "Ah, Pilates – the workout so intense, it even has biblical origins! 💪🙏 Who knew getting those abs of steel could be so… divine? 😂 #HolyGains"

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