Wordgag ツ

5 months ago
Share →: Whenever I’m with real yappers, I realize I might actually be a listener.

Commentary:
"Surround yourself with chatty friends, and suddenly you're nominated for 'Best Listener' award! 🏆🗣️ #TalkLessListenMore"
5 months ago
Share →: Gordon Ramsay is only funny because he’s not talking to me like that.

Commentary:
"Let's be real, Gordon Ramsay wouldn't last a second if he tried yelling at us over our cooking. 😂✋ #WorstNightmare"
5 months ago
Share →: I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

Commentary:
Isn't it amazing how toddlers can go on and on about nothing as if it's the most important thing in the world? 😂 It's like they're presenting a thesis on why socks shouldn't have seams or why the sky is actually purple. 🧦☁️ Toddler conversations: making the meaningless meaningful since forever!👶🗣️
5 months ago
Share →: I look stable, but I talk to animals and wait for them to reply.

Commentary:
"Who, me? Oh, just hanging out, having deep conversations with the squirrels 🐿️ and debating life's mysteries with the pigeons 🐦. Stability level: expert 🤪🐾 #AnimalWhisperer"
5 months ago
Share →: You can’t argue with me because I’ll just agree with you until you leave.

Commentary:
"Debating with this person is like trying to win at a game of 'Agree to Disagree'! 🤷‍♂️ When it comes to a battle of wits, they've perfected the art of making you agree yourself out of the discussion. 😆 #MasterOfAgreeing"
5 months ago
Share →: I don’t flirt, I just say weird things and hope something sticks.

Commentary:
"Flirting level: Expert in awkwardness 🤪 Who needs pickup lines when you've got a collection of bizarre statements? Just throwing spaghetti at the wall and seeing what sticks! 🍝😅 #AwkwardlyCharming"
5 months ago
Share →: I wish it were social acceptable to say “I don’t care” and walk away mid conversation when you’re bored.

Commentary:
"Oh, wouldn't that be the dream? 💁‍♂️ 'I don't care, gotta go water my houseplants 🌿' 🚶‍♂️ It'd spice up those dull conversations for sure! 😂 #SociallyAwkwardGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: If you’re looking for a quiet place to talk to yourself, my DMs are open.

Commentary:
"Need a secluded space to have those deep conversations with your inner voice? Slide into my DMs! 🤫💬 Who needs privacy when you have a direct messaging channel, right? 😂💌"
6 months ago
Share →: Shut up brain, I wasn’t even talking to me.

Commentary:
"Classic case of brain, always butting in uninvited! 🧠🤐 Just a friendly reminder to mind your own neurons, buddy 😂 #InnerMonologueIssues"
6 months ago
Share →: I said “cool tattoo” to be nice not because I wanted to hear the 45 minute origin story.

Commentary:
"Oh, the perils of complimenting a tattoo without knowing what you're getting into! 🙈 Next time, just nod and smile, folks! 😂"