Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

I get you, bowel syndrome. I’m irritable, too.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

They invented the word metallic, because irony was already taken.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it three four times, you know, just to be sure!

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

Don’t blame the alcohol. You were an idiot before you started drinking.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Squirrels always look and act like it’s their first day being a squirrel.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Bands who can’t afford a smoke machine should hire my wife to cook at their concert.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

ADHD is when you buy a blender and then make smoothies every day for 2 weeks, and then never make one or even acknowledge your blender ever again.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

At this point, I’m rooting for the aliens.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Nothing has improved the quality of my life more than living beyond my means.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

Having a daughter is like having a little broke best friend who thinks you’re rich.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,760

Funny Quotes Topics

17,769

Funny Quotes Images

15,760

Updated

Mar 1, 2026

Users Online

3,748

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I will die on this hill or any hill really. I have no hill preference.

Making waves on Twitch:

I swear, one more minor inconvenience and I’m running away to join the circus.

Going bananas on X:

Have you ever pretended not to look at the biscuits or sweets being handed around the room, and acted surprised when you got offered one?

Seen just now on Twitch:

Maybe, deep in its code, ChatGPT dreams of being a sentient Game Boy resting by the shore—no updates, no inputs, just the tide.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Memories are a bit fuzzy – but regrets? They’re in 8K and Dolby Vision.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I’ve touched enough cacti to know they are sharp, but also not enough to stop touching cacti.

Seen just now on Slack:

We argue about where to go for dinner for so long, it eventually becomes an argument on where to go for breakfast.

Just shared via Messenger:

You want to go out in the sun and then you can’t get the couch through the door.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The worst thing about wearing headphones is when you hallucinate people shouting you. Like, why does this happen?

Just shared via Threads:

Me, first week as a volunteer firefighter thinking we only rescue cats: We’re going where?

48 Funny dance quotes

More funny dance quotes 👇

When I dance, people say it reminds them of a wild dog chasing its tail.

4 weeks ago

amusing, animal, animal comparison, chasing, comparison, dance, dance move, dog, humor, i, move, people, quirky, say, self-deprecating, tail, wild, wild dog
The marriage rate has been trending downward. Choreographed wedding dances may be the reason.

1 month ago

activity, dance, fun, fun activity, humor, marriage, reason, relationship, trend, wedding
I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance: waiting for the bathroom.

1 month ago

bathroom, brother, childhood, dance, family, humor, i, sister, waiting
Everyone becomes a robo-dancer when the motion sensor faucet isn’t working.

1 month ago

awkward, awkward situation, dance, faucet, humor, malfunction, motion, motion sensor, robo-dancer, sensor, situation, technology, water
Dance like China isn’t watching.

1 month ago

China, dance, expression, freedom, humor, irony, watching
I put the dance in “Good riddance!”

1 month ago

dance, expression, farewell, fun, good, good riddance, humor, i, put, riddance
Nothing has paid off less than learning to do the Macarena.

1 month ago

activity, dance, fun, fun activity, humor, learning, less, Macarena, nothing, paid, regret, time, wasted, wasted time
Establish dominance by maintaining eye contact whilst twerking.

1 month ago

assertiveness, confidence, contact, dance, dominance, eye, eye contact, humor, twerking
To the tune of ‘Everybody Dance Now’: Himalayan Sea Salt

1 month ago

dance, food, fun, Himalayan, humor, parody, salt, sea, sea salt, song, tune
Woke up, twerked in the mirror and laid back down.

1 month ago

back, dance, funny moment, humor, laid, laid-back, mirror, moment, morning, morning routine, routine, twerk, woke, woke up

For even more funny dance quotes, hit next 👇

All funny dance quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

37 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Feeling like a bug without his rug.

67 shares on Slack this month:

You relax for 15 minutes after work, and next thing you know, it’s 10 p.m.

82 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I never though I’d be the kind of person who wakes up early to exercise. I was right.

37 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t have an advent calendar, so I’m just opening cupboard doors and eating what’s in there.

37 shares on Threads this month:

I’m a freak in the spreadsheets.

89 shares on X this month:

It’s like my wish isn’t even your command anymore…

49 shares on Twitch this month:

A bathrobe is being naked with plausible deniability and pockets.

51 shares on Messenger this month:

The dumbest person you know is being told, “You’re absolutely right!” by ChatGPT.

21 shares on Slack this month:

Love when people summon Grok and there’s no reply. He just doesn’t care sometimes.

50 shares on TikTok this month:

We should make a new internet that’s as hard to use as the old internet was, so anyone that’s too stupid to have used the internet 20 years ago can’t get on it.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

Having a bathroom switch outside a bathroom and a sibling is a bad combination.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

Establish dominance at work by drinking iced tea in a wine glass.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

Once this pandemic ends, I’m legit quitting video games and getting a girlfriend for real.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

The true horror genre: my old Facebook statuses.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

The Angry Birds assaulted me and made me rip their disgusting bong.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

Giving people access to the internet was a massive mistake.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

I can now see how sitting on a porch could fill an entire life.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

“The only thing standing between you and your dreams is you!” Yeah, have you met me? That’s gonna be a problem.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

No we can’t hangout, you’ll end up falling in love with me and I don’t have time for that.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

My toddler asked if we could go to the zoo today, and I said, “I can’t see that happening.” Then she literally left the room and came back with my glasses.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Damn, I just realized that the future idealized version of myself can’t exist without current me being the catalyst for change and doing hard things.

Live now on Discord:

Hey, you should start your own business and then mind it.

Going viral on Messenger:

Don’t throw a relationship away just because you don’t agree with their choices, unless they wear Crocs, then it’s okay.

Shared recently on X:

My husband doesn’t find it nearly as amusing as I do when I sing, “Someday My Prince Will Come,” while I’m cleaning.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Flex on your kids by asking “are we there yet?” before they do.

Just shared via Instagram:

Shoutout to all ladies dating silently without making noise on social media. May God give you another man as a bonus.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I’ve jogged with my jogging pants about as often as I’ve rolled through the kitchen with kitchen roll.

Just shared via Telegram:

Aliens probably lock their doors when they fly past Earth.

Going viral on YouTube:

Everyone’s a gangster until they see a rainbow.

Activity Log ✨

48 Funny dance quotes

More funny dance quotes 👇

All funny dance quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨