1528 Funny relationship quotes

• What happened to the art of just liking one person?

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  1 week ago

  affection, art, commitment, dating, just, liking, love, loyalty, person, relationship

• Dogs have two jobs: calm their humans when they are stressed. Stress their humans when they are calm.

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  1 week ago

  animal, animal humor, behavior, calm, dog, dogs, funny observation, human, humans, humor, jobs, observation, pet, pet behavior, relationship, stress

• Just gave my boyfriend an incorrect direction in the car, and he sighed and muttered to himself, “Never assign to malice what can be attributed to incompetence.”

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  1 week ago

  boyfriend, car, direction, driving, funny statement, humor, incompetence, incorrect, just, malice, never, relationship, statement

• If she forgives you, then 30 minutes later comes back mad again: that means she told her friends in her group chat, and the board of directors did not agree.

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  1 week ago

  30, again, agree, anger, back, board, board of directors, chat, communication, conflict, conflict resolution, directors, forgiveness, friends, group, group chat, humor, later, mad, means, minutes, relationship, resolution, told

• Watching my wife absolutely hate my daughter’s boyfriend while being nice and hospitable to him has made me question every interaction I’ve had with another human being in my life.

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  1 week ago

  absolutely, another, awkward, awkward interaction, being, boyfriend, daughter, every, family, hate, hospitality, human, humor, interaction, life, me, nice, question, relationship, watching, while, wife

• Marriage is where you gasp while your husband is driving, and he gets super annoyed over and over.

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  1 week ago

  annoyance, annoyed, driving, gasp, humor, husband, marriage, over, relationship, super, where, while

• Printers and computers treat each other like they broke up the night before, and you’re their mutual friend.

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  1 week ago

  before, breakup, broke, communication, computer, computers, friend, friendship, humor, mutual, mutual friend, night, printer, printers, relationship, technology, treat

• I think fathers lose their mind a little bit when they realize their daughters aren’t as forgiving as their wives.

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  1 week ago

  bit, daughter, family, father, forgiveness, humor, i, little, lose, mind, realize, relationship, think, wife

• Shout out to the people getting $400 hotel rooms on Feb 14th to do the same two positions they do at home.

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  1 week ago

  14th, couple, day, expensive, getting, home, hotel, hotel room, humor, people, position, positions, relationship, room, rooms, same, sex, sex position, shout, travel, valentine’s, Valentine’s Day

• I’m sorry to break it to you, but you need a soul to have a soulmate.

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  1 week ago

  break, dating, humor, love, need, relationship, sarcasm, sorry, soul, soulmate, witty

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