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Funny shape quotes

  • If biscuits were slimming and contained every nutrient the human body needs, I’d be in terrific shape.

    Commentary:
    “If only biscuits had the power to sculpt abs and provide essential nutrients, we’d all be lining up for the biscuit diet plan faster than you can say ‘pass the butter’. But alas, the struggle for a beach-ready body continues, while we console ourselves with the knowledge that at least biscuits will always be here for us in our times of need (and cravings).”

  • Sorry I’m late, my dog was sleeping in the shape of a donut and I had to take so many photos.

    Commentary:
    “Sounds like a legitimate reason for being fashionably late! 🍩📸 Who can resist capturing such adorable donut-shaped moments, right? Next time, just blame it on the dog – guaranteed no one will be mad! 😄🐶 #Priorities”

  • Went jogging and came back after five minutes because I forgot something. Forgot I’m out of shape.

    Commentary:
    “Embarking on a jog only to realize your body is staging a rebellion… Classic case of fitness amnesia! 🏃🤦‍♂️ #OutOfShapeStruggles”

  • My husband said we need to start exercising and get into shape, so I’m going to wake up early tomorrow and start looking for a new husband.

    Commentary:
    Well, they do say that finding a new husband can be quite the workout! 💪😂 Who needs the gym when you can just go husband-hunting instead? 🏃‍♀️🔍 #NewHusbandNewMe

  • When I was in elementary school, we learned about a shape called a rhombus, and that was the last time I ever heard about that shape ever again.

    Commentary:
    Looks like the rhombus got voted off the elementary school island, never to be seen again! 🔺 Farewell, rhombus, you were acute one! 🤣 #GeometryGoneMissing

  • I am so out of shape right now, that if someone yelled “run for your life!” I’d be like “ya’ll go ahead, I’m meetin’ Jesus today!”

    Commentary:
    “Who needs cardio when you can have a spiritual awakening, am I right? 🏃‍♂️🙏 #runninglateforheaven”

  • Looking to sell my DeLorean. Great shape, low mileage. Only driven from time to time.

    Commentary:
    “Looking to part ways with my DeLorean – it’s in great shape and has low mileage. 🚗💨 Only driven from time to time… literally! ⏳ Who needs roads when you can travel through time? 😉⏰ #BackToTheFuture”

  • I keep my eyes in great shape by rolling them constantly.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the powerful exercise routine of eye rolling – the epitome of cardio for the soul! 🙄💪 Who needs a gym when you can keep those eyes in shape just by staying effortlessly unimpressed?” 😄

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