417 Funny should quotes

• A gentle reminder that if your birth year starts with a 19, you should consider wrapping the Christmas presents on a table, and not on the floor.

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  18 hours ago

  birth, birth year, Christmas, Christmas present, consider, floor, gentle, gift, gift wrap, holiday, humor, present, presents, reminder, should, table, wrap, wrapping, year

• Grocery stores should have baskets in the middle of the store for those “I really overestimated how much I can carry” moments.

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  5 days ago

  basket, carry, carrying, convenience, grocery, grocery store, humor, i, middle, moments, much, overestimate, shopping, should, store, stores

• They should make a biopic of just some random guy.

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  5 days ago

  biography, biopic, guy, humor, just, movie, random, random guy, satire, should

• I should be able to eat one huge meal a month, like a snake. This every-few-hours shit sucks.

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  1 week ago

  able, complaint, eat, eating, food, huge, humor, hunger, i, meal, month, shit, should, snake, sucks

• Car insurance should give you back money at the end of the year for having no accidents.

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  1 week ago

  accident, accidents, back, car, car insurance, end, give, having, insurance, insurance policy, money, policy, refund, reward, safety, safety reward, should, year

• I am sick and tired of going to the bathroom. It’s been forty years. It should all be out by now.

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  1 week ago

  aging, am, bathroom, complaint, forty, frustration, going, humor, i, should, sick, time, tired

• There should be bloopers at the end of horror films to relax the viewer before sleeping.

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  1 week ago

  before, bloopers, credits, end, end credits, film, films, horror, horror film, movie, relax, should, sleep, sleeping, viewer

• There should be a “Take Your Friend to Work Day,” so we can actually see what our friends do all day and meet the characters from all their work stories.

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  1 week ago

  activity, actually, character, characters, day, friend, friends, humor, meet, should, story, take, work

• I’m of the very strong opinion that sex ed should be taught by a woman 37 weeks into her third pregnancy, while her husband sits scrolling through his phone, and her other two children run wild.

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  1 week ago

  child, children, ed, family, humor, husband, multitasking, opinion, parenting, phone, pregnancy, run, scrolling, sex, sex ed, should, strong, taught, third, through, weeks, while, wild, woman

• “Full-time” should be 20 hours max, man. This is ridiculous. I’ve got other stuff to do.

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  1 week ago

  20, frustration, full-time, got, hours, humor, man, management, max, ridiculous, should, stuff, time, time management, work, work hours, workload

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