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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

The female brain works like the internet. You can delete something, but it’s never really gone.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

The highlight of my weekends is slipping into something more comfortable and putting my feet up.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

The dopamine hit of getting an Outlook meeting cancellation is unrivaled.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

Yes, my sex drive is higher than my will to live, and what about it?

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

If I text you an accordion emoji, it means you better start acting accordingly.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Need someone to feed me Doritos while I read, so I don’t mess up the pages. No weirdos.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Wine must breathe. I always hear that wine needs to breathe. I want to drink it and not revive it.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

I won’t be accepting any parcels for the neighbors in December this year. Last year it was all junk.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Honestly, how women are drawn in a manga is typically (though not always) a good clue for what demographic a manga series is.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Alexa, take responsibility for my actions.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2522 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,684

Funny Quotes Topics

15,348

Funny Quotes Images

12,684

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,455

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Nice to finally get back that hour they stole earlier this year.

Making waves on WeChat:

The dude who invented the autocorrect has died. Restaurant in piece.

Reported on Twitch:

God, never seen San Francisco this bad. Spiderwebs completely covering entire business, skeletons just strewn about sidewalks in every neighborhood. Things have got to change!

Shared recently on TikTok:

I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn’t even know they knew how to knit.

Trending via Discord:

Why can’t men just call you pretty without wording it uncomfortably?

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Just got hired at Five Guys as the guy who punches the burger before they put it in the bag.

Spotted on Messenger:

That annoying moment when you’re texting someone and autocorrect decides to join the conversation.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

If she tells you, she’s got a man, keep trying. Loyal women don’t even reply.

Reported on Slack:

These weekends are starting to feel as long as a lunch break.

Making waves on Slack:

I’m not good with plants or people, but I am good with books and buffets.

Home » Funny Situation Quotes » Page 4

206 Funny situation quotes

More funny situation quotes 👇

4 weeks ago
Share →: My boyfriend invited the neighbors over for dinner, “sometime,” so now we have to move.

Commentary:
Looks like it's time to start packing those boxes! Hope your new neighbors aren't as hungry! 😅📦🍽️
4 weeks ago
Share →: Current situation: lying in bed, trying to manifest breakfast.

Commentary:
Manifesting breakfast is my new cardio routine 🍳✨ #DreamBigEatBigger
4 weeks ago
Share →: We’ve got a shituation here.

Commentary:
"Looks like it’s time to call in the poo-lice! 🚨💩😂"
4 weeks ago
Share →: You ever feel awkward in Target, cause you know you belong at Walmart.

Commentary:
"When you walk into Target and feel like you’re on an episode of 'Undercover Shoplifter' 😂🕵️‍♂️🚫 #WalmartAtHeart"
1 month ago
Share →: Odd—my boss told me to meet him at the abandoned quarry at midnight for my performance evaluation.

Commentary:
"Seems like your boss really rocks! Just hope he doesn't leave you between a rock and a hard place 😅🪨🌘"
1 month ago
Share →: One time, I was so high my bra unclasped, and I thought I got shot.

Commentary:
"Sounds like a real *bust* of a night! 🤣🔫😮‍💨 #Bra-dventures"
1 month ago
Share →: Calling it a situationship, and the whole time, the situation is that they don’t want you.

Commentary:
"When you realize your 'situationship' is just you in a solo episode of 'Unrequited Love Island'! 🌴😅💔 #PlotTwist"
1 month ago
Share →: My lotion bottle says to use it on areas of irritation, so I slathered it all over my coworker, Deborah.

Commentary:
"Who knew lotion could double as a Deborah repellant? 😅🧴 #SmoothMoves #KeepingThePeace"
1 month ago
Share →: That one unemployed roommate who gets a package every day.

Commentary:
"Seems like their job is just opening packages! 📦😂 #ProfessionalUnwrapper"
1 month ago
Share →: When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

Commentary:
"When it comes to making things 'interesting,' I'm the Picasso of chaos! 🎨🤣💥"

For even more funny situation quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny situation quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

Having a job ruined my life.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

I remember when a computer didn’t automatically connect to the internet, it used to make a screaming noise. We should have listened.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

Crying while wearing a backpack has unlocked a new level of humiliation I did not know was possible.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

“It’s Raining Men” and “Let the Bodies Hit the Floor” are the same song from different points of view.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Men, it’s really simple. We want everything, but nothing, at the same time or different times, sometimes but not always.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Grab your own butt! Love yourself!

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Do you also have teenagers whose styling motto is: freeze to death for coolness?

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

My boss told me to show initiative, so I decided to finish work early.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Cocktails can be tricky, because they taste like juice, but then the next thing you know… you can’t walk.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on X:

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok,” yeah, well, I wipe away the hours conversing with the flowers.

Just shared via YouTube:

“Clean” my shower? Then what? Give my car a ride into town?

Seen just now on Facebook:

Being too stressed isn’t good for the baby. I’m not pregnant though, it’s just that I’m the baby.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Be the one that gets asked to remove the hockey mask, during a conference call, on Friday the 13th.

Just landed via TikTok:

A lobotomy and a forehead kiss would fix everything.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I used to have a great future in my past.

Making waves on YouTube:

“I have a favourite hole”, me, at the pool table.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

After my funeral, I want one of my friends to take my phone and text everyone, “Thanks for coming.”

Spotted on TikTok:

My bed wasn’t feeling well this morning, so I had to stay home to take care of it.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

When you want to feel at your thinnest, walk through Walmart at any time of day.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

206 Funny situation quotes

More funny situation quotes 👇

For even more funny situation quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny situation quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I once hated my job so much that I would come home from work and watch vlogs of people quitting their jobs, wishing it was me.

Training a cat is very easy. After a few days, you do what she wants.

Blowing over it is also dusting.

Whenever I’m sad, you’re there. Whenever I have problems, you’re there. Whenever I lose control, you’re there. Let’s face it, you are bad luck.

I hate small cars that disguise themselves as free parking spaces and drop their masks as soon as you pull up in front of them.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

On the surface: cool as a cucumber. On the inside: squirrel in traffic.

I wonder if the guy who came up with the term “One Hit Wonder” came up with any other phrases?

Going to bed early is easy, going to sleep early is a whole other set of problems.

Napping is the best activity for weight loss, because I can’t eat anything when I’m asleep!

Drink coffee, avoid idiots, read books and repeat.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Today I ate vegetable lasagna… I don’t want to talk about it.

I wonder what other animals we tried to ride before discovering that horses were cool with it.

I wonder if my bank account thinks about me and has panic attacks.

Parenting just means you have to pretend you like to eat fruits and vegetables in front of your kids, knowing you’d rather eat a cheeseburger instead.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

It’s like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a Like.

I like to stay grounded by keeping the weight of the world on my shoulders.

I have read that there are imaginary pregnancies. The belly gets bigger and bigger, but there is no baby inside. Finally a diagnosis.

Nasa is launching a satellite to say sorry to the aliens. They’re calling it the Apollo G.

Because it is Friday, I will allow one beautiful woman to invite me for drinks.

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