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24 Funny customer quotes

Trending Funny Customer Quotes 🔥

“Your call is very important to us. Please stay on the line until your call is no longer important to you.”
I got fired for telling customers if they wanted “smoking or non-smoking”. Apparently, the correct term in the funeral home business is “cremation or burial”.
I had the most impatient and rudest cashier. I’m never using self-checkout again.
They should invent a customer service center that isn’t “currently experiencing higher than normal call volume”.
How to write complaints: “Dear customer service, first of all, you should know that I am typing this with my middle finger.”

New funny customer quotes 👇

4 weeks ago
Share →: People who work in customer service should be allowed to fight one customer a day. Two on Fridays.

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Commentary:
"Finally, a way to end the week with a *bang*! 🥊💥 Just imagine the 'Buy One, Get One Free' of stress relief! 🤣🙌 #FistOfTheWeek"
4 weeks ago
Share →: Your Starbucks order leads me to believe that you’re very difficult to deal with.

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Commentary:
"With an order like that, your barista must have a PhD in patience! ☕😅 #BaristaChronicles"
4 months ago
Share →: I had the most impatient and rudest cashier. I’m never using self-checkout again.

Commentary:
Well, it sounds like that self-checkout experience was more like a self-checkout disaster! Who knew a machine could be so rude and impatient? Looks like you'll be sticking to the good old human cashiers for now.
4 months ago
Share →: Your call is really important to us but first enjoy this clarinet number for the next seventy five minutes.

Commentary:
🎷🤣 "Attention, attention! Your call is so important to us that we've decided to serenade you with an epic clarinet performance. Get ready for an unforgettable seventy-five minute musical journey… or until we remember you're still waiting on the line! 😉🎶 #HoldMusicGoals #CustomerServiceChill"
5 months ago
Share →: Not to brag, but I’m on hold and my call is important to them.

Commentary:
"Ah, the ultimate test of patience: being on hold and reminded that your call is *so* important to them… Must be their way of saying, 'Please hold for eternity.' 🕰️🤣 #ImportantCallVibes"
5 months ago
Share →: People who work in retail should be allowed to slap a customer or two each Christmas, as a little treat.

Commentary:
"Imagine a jolly holiday season where retail workers get to sprinkle a little *slap* of cheer on those difficult customers. 🎁👋 Let's just say, it could add a whole new meaning to the phrase 'customer service with a *smack*!'"
5 months ago
Share →: They should invent a customer service center that isn’t “currently experiencing higher than normal call volume”.

Commentary:
Absolutely! 🤔 Maybe a customer service center with a magical hotline that actually transports you to a stress-free, problem-solving wonderland instead of making you listen to elevator music for hours on end. 🧚‍♂️✨ Let's hope the "higher than normal call volume" excuse becomes a thing of the past! 📞🙅‍♂️
5 months ago
Share →: How to write complaints: “Dear customer service, first of all, you should know that I am typing this with my middle finger.”

Commentary:
"Dear customer service, I thought about writing this complaint with my quill pen, but then I realized my middle finger typing skills are far more impressive. 🖕😂"
5 months ago
Share →: Your call is very important to us, here’s six days of irritating music.

Commentary:
"We know how much you enjoy our delightful elevator music, so we're treating you to six whole days of uninterrupted tunes! 🎵 Don't worry, your call will be answered eventually… we think. 📞😅"
5 months ago
Share →: Airlines when they need to change your flight: here’s a complimentary napkin. Airlines when you need to change your flight: that’ll be $8700.

Commentary:
"Airlines be like: 🛫 'Here's a complimentary napkin to dry those tears of despair!' 💸✈️ 'Oh you want to change your flight? That'll be $8700, plus an arm and a leg please!' 😂 #FlyingStruggles"