31 Funny cut quotes

• Emotions? No thanks. I’m trying to cut down.

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  3 hours ago

  coping, coping mechanism, cut, emotion, emotions, humor, lighthearted, mechanism, sarcasm, self-control, trying

• A real smartphone would cut you off.

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  19 hours ago

  communication, cut, humor, real, sarcasm, smartphone, technology

• Therapy isn’t gonna cut it, I need vengeance.

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  2 days ago

  cut, health, humor, i, mental, mental health, need, revenge, therapy, vengeance

• A friend of mine decided to cut all the toxic people out of his life, or so I was informed.

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  2 days ago

  cut, decision, friend, humor, i, informed, life, mine, people, person, toxic, toxic person

• There is a special place reserved in hell for website designers who disable cut and paste in password fields.

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  6 days ago

  cut, cut and paste, design, designer, field, frustration, hell, humor, password, password field, paste, place, special, usability, user, user frustration, web, web design, website, website designer

• Hand sanitizer will find a cut you didn’t even know you had.

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  3 weeks ago

  cut, even, hand, hand sanitizer, health, humor, hygiene, joke, know, pain, sanitizer

• Me: I have a cut under my fingernail. Universe: Excellent, I will send you an unusually high number of encounters with citrus fruit.

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  3 weeks ago

  citrus, citrus fruit, cut, encounter, exaggeration, excellent, fingernail, fruit, high, humor, i, injury, me, number, send, under, universe

• After hearing that I have too many books and too many bookshelves, I’ve decided to cut back on the amount of people I listen to.

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  1 month ago

  advice, after, amount, back, book, books, bookshelf, cut, decision, hearing, humor, i, listen, listening, people, reading, too

• To cut a long story short, I became a film editor.

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  2 months ago

  career, cut, editing, editor, film, film editor, humor, i, pun, short, short story, story, storytelling

• Coffee ain’t gonna cut it today, I need to be chased through the woods by a machete-wielding maniac.

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  2 months ago

  adventure, chaotic, chaotic morning, coffee, craving, cut, exaggerated, exaggerated craving, humor, i, machete, maniac, morning, need, relief, stress, stress relief, through, today, woods

All funny cut quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌