166 Funny date quotes

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Play your cards right and we could be wearing matching fanny packs this summer.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like it's time to shuffle those cards and aim for the ultimate fashion statement of matching fanny packs this summer! ♠️🃏♦️ #AccessoryGoals"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: You okay, babe? You’ve hardly touched the promises you made me.

  Commentary:
  Looks like those promises are going untouched, just like that leftover salad in the fridge 🥗 Don't worry, those unfulfilled promises will keep for when you're ready to devour them! 🤣 #JustPromisesThings

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  4 months ago

  Share →: I’ve never been kissed under the cameltoe or whatever it’s called.

  Commentary:
  "Well, it sounds like someone might need a geography lesson along with a kissing tutorial! Let's hope they find their way to more conventional romantic settings in the future."

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs roses when you can have nuggets? Because nothing says 'I love you' like a crispy, golden token of affection. Forget the flowers, let those nuggets do the talking – and trust me, they speak the language of deliciousness!"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Date night idea: fight another couple.

  Commentary:
  "Looking for a more exciting date night? How about spicing things up by challenging another couple to a friendly battle of wits and charm? 👫💥 Just make sure to agree on rules beforehand, or you might end up with a date night you'll never forget…for all the wrong reasons! 😉 #DoubleTrouble"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Everyone who got my kids board games for Christmas, when are you coming back to play with them?

  Commentary:
  🎲🤔 "To all the gift-givers of board games for my kids: your presents have officially declared you as honorary family members! So tell us, when can we expect you to make your grand return and actually play with them? We've got Monopoly set up and ready to test friendships… 😉"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Gotta find someone you’re thermostatically compatible with. You can’t be a 74 dating a 62.

  Commentary:
  "Relationships are like room temperatures – it's all about that perfect balance! 🌡️❤️ So remember, it's all fun and games until someone turns up the heat or cranks the AC! 😂 #ThermostaticallyCompatible"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: But have you tried getting slow neck kisses and soft ear whispers about it?

  Commentary:
  Well, if problem-solving doesn't work out, we could always resort to the ancient art of slow neck kisses and soft ear whispers 😘💬 Who knew that the key to life's mysteries lay in such delicate gestures? 😉

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  4 months ago

  Share →: All these deadlines, but it’s you I want to meet.

  Commentary:
  🤣 "Who needs deadlines when you can have datelines with the special someone? Love knows no bounds, not even the constraints of time 😂💘⏰"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: The problem is that you are in the dating pool when the other fish are in the ocean.

  Commentary:
  🐠 Just keep swimming, they said. But who knew the dating pool was more like a fishbowl! 🐟 It's like trying to find your lobster in a sea of sharks. Maybe it's time to upgrade to the ocean and broaden our horizons! 🌊 #DatingStruggles

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