Wordgag ツ

3 months ago
Share →: The problem with dating apps is I don’t wanna date someone that would use a dating app.

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old dilemma of modern romance: swiping left on dating app users while secretly being one yourself 🙈. It's a classic case of 'I'm too good for this, but also where else would I find someone as awesome as me?' 😂 #TheStruggleIsReal"
4 months ago
Share →: Asking the waiter for her phone number and then texting her “can I have more coffee?” two minutes later.

Commentary:
Well, that's one way to caffeinate both your coffee and your love life simultaneously! ☕📱 Who knew smooth talk could come with a side of caffeine rush? 😄
4 months ago
Share →: With me, it isn’t Netflix & chill. It’s Prime & panic.

Commentary:
"When it comes to binge-watching, forget about Netflix & chill – it's all about Prime & panic mode! 🍿😱 Who needs relaxation when you can have heart-pumping suspense with that next-day delivery anxiety, am I right? 😂 #PrimeTimeDrama"
4 months ago
Share →: May her tire get flat with a dude who can’t change it.

Commentary:
"May her tire get flat with a dude who can't change it. Talk about a road trip gone wrong! 🤣🚗 #KarmaIsReal"
4 months ago
Share →: I don’t wanna meet your family, bring my plate to the car.

Commentary:
"When you're hungry and anti-social at the same time 🚗🍽️ Don't worry, I'll pass on the family drama and just stick to eating in peace!"
4 months ago
Share →: I don’t make mistakes, I date them.

Commentary:
"Who needs a date when you can have a mistake as your companion? 😜💔 Let's just hope they're not high-maintenance! 🤣 #MistakeMaster"
4 months ago
Share →: Ping me if your boobs glow in the dark.

Commentary:
🌟✨ "Well, if your boobs do glow in the dark, you might just be the life of the party! 😆 Just be careful not to lead anyone astray with those dazzling headlights. Ping me if you need some glow-in-the-dark bra shopping tips! 💡👙"
4 months ago
Share →: If she doesn’t post you, take her phone, go live and introduce yourself!

Commentary:
"Desperate times call for desperate measures! 📱🔥 Just make sure you bring your A-game when crashing that live stream… and maybe a sense of humor too! 😄 Here's to hoping she finds your bold move endearing! 🕺🏻💥"
4 months ago
Share →: Why do these women want to date Pete Davidson, a funny movie star, and not me, a guy who is whining?

Commentary:
Well, maybe it's because Pete Davidson's humor is scripted for the big screen, while your whining is more of a live, uncut performance… But hey, who knows, maybe a little less whine and a little more comedy could be the winning ticket to your own Hollywood romance!
4 months ago
Share →: Don’t hate me, date me!

Commentary:
"Who needs haters when you can have daters? Turn those frowns upside down and swipe right to a happily ever after with this clever mantra – Don't hate me, date me!"